MooPig Pre-Rapture Preparation :: "Newspaper Hat!"

Using Newspaper for your Rapture Hats
Retrieved by Pat Darnell | June 2, 2011 | Bryan TX

Being caught up is a goal of many people around the globe. That is why indomitable MooPig staffers all had their hats on for the last Rapture date: May 21, 2011. Research brought to light that God likes hats -- so if you need a hat for the next Rapture notice here is a great solution.

You are prepared to be included in Rapture, but your trusty Fedora is not nearby, in a jiffy you can fold yourself a Newspaper Hat just before being swept up to God.

“If a woman rebels against high-heeled shoes, she should take care to do it in a very smart hat” (George Bernard Shaw)

You should practice making a few hats before the big morning of being called into the air. Here is your LINK to instructions for folding your very own Newspaper hat out of today's Tribune pages:
Click here: Newspaper Hat!

“Grab your coat, and get your hat, Leave your worry on the doorstep Just direct your feet, To the sunny side of the street.” (Dorothy Fields)

“If the best man's faults were written on his forehead, he would draw his hat over his eyes.” (Thomas Gray)

“It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off.” (Woody Allen)

“This is what you shall do: love the earth and sun, and animals, despise riches, give alms to every one that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labor to others, hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have patience and indulgence towards the people, take off your hat to nothing known or unknown, or to any man or number of men; go freely with the powerful uneducated persons, and with the young, and mothers, of families: read these leaves in the open air every season of every year of your life: re-examine all you have been told at school or church, or in any books, and dismiss whatever insults your soul.” (Walt Whitman)

MORE LINKS to Newspaper Hats:
Rock On With Yer Crafty Self!!
How to Build your own Newspaper Hat by intoon
How to make a Duct Tape Hat by Wills42

“I met in the street a very poor young man who was in love. His hat was old, his coat worn, his cloak was out at the elbows, the water passed through his shoes, - and the stars through his soul.”

Victor Hugo

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"Let me put it bluntly: This won't work" (J C DVORAK)

Newspaper Publishers Are Idiots
by John C. Dvorak

So now we hear that The New York Times is contemplating the notion of becoming a subscription-based Web site, where you only get to read it if you pay real money. What a quaint idea.

Let me put it bluntly: This won't work. It will completely sink the publication faster than it's already sinking.
[... Read the Entire PC Magazine Article HERE]
So should the newspaper go the way of the buggy whip? No, it just needs to return to its roots, and focus on providing densely edited and directed information of importance as decided by a trustworthy source. And it should leave the fluff to the Internet.

For too long newspapers have taken on the role of cultural arbiter and distribution channel for popular culture ideas. That is all over and can never return.

That said, nobody has nailed the new model for the old newspaper. These publishers are out-and-out idiots. They see something online and immediately try to do the same thing in print. "We want color ink and more stories about celebrities!"

I was doing research at the University of California Newspaper Library, which has a tremendous collection of microfilmed old newspapers from every era. If you want to see the heyday of the newspaper business and quickly see what would work today, look at a 1954 edition of The San Francisco Examiner. It's so dense with news stories that today's papers look as if there's nothing in them. It is extremely compelling.

The point is that there are good ideas already out there, and they just need to be rediscovered. But for now the panic-stricken bosses seem to be heading down the same abyss in the same direction. It's the direction that created the abyss in the first place.