Moo Pig Wisdom is a brilliant combination of Antiquity and Prequel Modern Flea Market. We respectfully ask you to mind your children while here.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Poetry Coroner: Poem found DOA





I Drive a Truck
by Pat Darnell

I drive a truck
that's got something written
...on the side

I drive a truck
it's got something written
...on the side

It says Micro Mickey's
Double D-D's
Carpet Cleaning
Specialties and Supplies
Honk if you like.. it says...
if you like the way I drive

I drive a truck
wid' that written
on the side

I got no where
to go that
I can really hide
Mickey thinks its funny
I don't see it all that way
he don't have to drive it
like I drive it around all day...
I might drive to Alabama
I might drive to Oceanside
I might drive to Odessa
Or Columbus, Ohi'
Or maybe Argentina;
People allus' honkin' at me
...nowhere can I hide, in'a
truck with them things...
...written on the side

if you see me out a truckin'
remember how I...
...remember how I ride
please don't...
please don't honk at me
when you read...
...when you read what's
written on the side.

Lot's of trucks goin' by
...going by all day and night
"You the only one I can trust
with all those supplies..."
Says Mickey D D to my cries.

Blue, silver-tan; green and white
lot's of trucks going by
I'm feelin' so uptight....

Some of them got something...
something written on their side...
I drive D-D's truck...
...cannot shuck ya and jive...
cannot lay down dirty and die--
You know Mickey: I cannot tell you lies

I sure am wishin' that I was not denied...
'sure wish I could,
...could a' instead a' drive --
Could a' instead a' drive
a Harley Davidson Electra Glide

Lawd a'mercy... Lawd alive--
please deliver me, Lawd
...deliver me from this
...this delivery truck I drive
wi' all that mess
...all that mess,
written up on its side.

[Endorsed by The P Darnell and Arthur T Reading Rainbow Write at least one Poem a Week Coalition 1986 - 2009]

Monday, June 29, 2009

Bo Derek's Rate the Mug Shots Monday: King\Queen of Bop... Who's the Boppin'est?



Winner from First Ever Rate the Mug Shots MooPig -- he\she\it goes by the handle: Pribek ! Whad'ya'know... how quaint. [HERE --June 15] Yes this person has a mug only a mudder could love ! Pribek will enjoy being matched up with Phil Spector, and nine turtle doves, for an evening at the Continental Bus Station in San Antonio for a probation violation relay race. What Fun!


"Hi, I'm Bo Derek... As you may remember, MooPig Enterprises has syndicated my column. I welcome the opportunity to bring "Rate the Mug Shots" to the MooPig Wisdom Blogger Venue.

This week we are taking it way back and asking "Will the King and Queen of Bop please sign in, and step up to be finger-printed... and some of you implanted."

"All you have to do is rate each of today's mug shot with a "
1 to 10" with "10" being the highest rating of how bopped is she or he. No looking at each others' answers, now...

I then press the numbers from 715 nations, and starch the derivatives to come up with monthly matches that prove to be a load of FUN! It beats that FaceBook stuff... right?

A Oprah
B Sean Combs
C James Brown
D David Bowie
E Shrek
F Michael Jackson
G Janis Jolin
H Vinnie








Gotta Have Nose to get Married

Tehran is Capital of Nose Jobs?
by Pat Darnell and the MooPig Department of Statistics

Iranian strict dress code, puts the nose as the fore front protuberance for women in Iran. And reports now state Iranian men too feel the wind changing in attraction mechanics. The Persian nose is out of style... what if it comes back ??? YIKES!!
Satellite TV initiated the Barbie $1500 for a nose, or $2000 for two??, in Iran. Nip and tuck can be tricky, but patients prefer to pay than pray for a better "Western" nose.

Speaking of Nips... See Previous pin up girl post in MooPig: Farrah Fawcett... and Gotta have Chin to be a Thespian.

Liposuction of the belly and butt, arms, or thigh's fat is not in demand in Iran because the women still adhere to the burkha cover up. It is a religious garb that covers everything but the face of Iranian Muslim women... in case you have been living in a Winnebago deep in the woods for the past ten years.... Women have it in their minds that when they come of age, around 15 or 16.. then it it nose job time. They critique their own profiles and decide not "if" but "when" their proboscis could use a shave.

Also as all young girls grow up in the most mysterious ways, she decides to believe that there will be only one male to ten women in the future population... unconfirmed by MooPig Statistics of Foreign Nations Department... yet if it is true, young women believe they will have to attract their mates with face.. Yes, you heard it first here at MooPig F-A-C-E is the pace for Tehran women of the twenty-first century.

*["Oh, wait what year is it in Islam? Hey, Floyd, what's up with you statistic guys..? we need hard facts here to finish this article ...!!"]*

-- Meanwhile -- while we look up some facts...
Well, closing, don't our nemeses Mid-east states ever get any re-runs of Jimmy Durante? Or Eleanor Roosevelt? I suppose the nose is apropos in those minds of men and women in Tehran.

Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson and BILLY MAYS ??!

Did someone say Rule of Fours??
Unauthorized Capture of Story by Pat Darnell

(CNN) -- Infomercial pitchman Billy Mays died at his Tampa, Florida, home Sunday morning, authorities told CNN.

OxiClean pitchman Billy Mays died Sunday morning at his home in Tampa, authorities said.

OxiClean pitchman Billy Mays died Sunday morning at his home in Tampa, authorities said.

The 50-year-old known for his shouting OxiClean ads was pronounced dead at 7:45 a.m. The Hillsborough County medical examiner will perform an autopsy, Tampa police Lt. Brian Dugan said.

Mays was on the US Airways flight from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, to Tampa on Saturday that had a hard landing at Tampa International Airport when the plane's front tire blew out. There were no reported injuries on Flight 1241, US Airways told CNN.

According to a local Tampa TV station, Mays said: "All of a sudden as we hit you know it was just the hardest hit, all the things from the ceiling started dropping. It hit me on the head, but I got a hard head."

Airline spokesman Jim Olson told CNN Sunday there were no reported passenger injuries from flight 1241. The airline vowed to "cooperate fully" with authorities in the investigation.

"We were very sad to learn of Billy Mays' passing and our thoughts and prayers go out to his family," Olson said. Tampa officials say the Medical Examiner's Office expects to complete an autopsy by Monday afternoon. In a statement, Deborah Mays said that although "Billy lived a public life," the family does not plan immediate public statements about his death.


Billy Mays, OxiClean pitchman, found dead
STORY HIGHLIGHTS
Billy Mays, 50, is best known for his ads in which he shouts the attributes of OxiClean
The pitchman was pronounced dead Sunday morning, authorities said
Mays was on a plane that had a rough landing in Tampa, Florida, on Saturday
updated 7:11 p.m. EDT, Sun June 28, 2009

Sunday, June 28, 2009

UPDATE: Gotta have Chin --
To be a Thespian...

PHOTO: Rupert Murdoch and chins

Compose yourselves patrons -- Rupert Murdoch has been here, and finds our display as attractive as the south bound end of a north bound clown... [see comments]

Mr Murdoch, we know you have been abducted by aliens who support Che Guevarra and Castro and their reigns of communism, so how do you suppose we will let you in the final days not be punished... huh?


###########################


Ever Noticed Chins on the Thespian Crowd in Cinema and Stage and Music?

::by Pat Darnell and these Talented Un-notified Contributors from 08.2008

About this time last year, Celebrity Chin Faces at FreakingNews.com have adequately illustrated this phenomenon for my satisfaction... and I present this to you, loyal reader, as a testament to what started with most probably the Nixon -- Kennedy Presidential Debates,, way back in the 1960's.


This contest is fueled by the following news:
Chin is the lowermost part of face, located from top to bottom from lower lip. Shape of the chin determined by structure of bones of lower jaw and muscles, near it: mental muscle, quadrate muscle of lower lip, triangular muscle and also fat deposits. Blood supply reaches from lower alveolar artery, innervation is accomplished by mental or by mental nerve, representing derivation of trigeminal nerve. So-called “mental protuberance” – bossed torus, going along lower edge of mandibular bone, is characteristic for Homo Sapiens. Along with a number of other features, presence of mental protuberance allows to distinguish fossil remains of Homo sapiens from remains of extinct types of family Homo, [ ,,, ] and so on [ ... ] Read it all
HERE..
Now if you will restrain from looking at FreakingNews.com for a moment -- and try to name these four Celeb' Chin Faces pictured here -- Hint: "Sex was never the same after Re-hab for Young Frankenstein just before Trepanned..." [that's your hint for all four]




These observations are brought to you via MooPig "We notice Stuff" Department of Inferior Desecrations, and the Arthur P and T Rowe Ur Boot A. Shure Foundations.

Also Thanks to Marinell for pointing out the protuberances of much loved bad girl -- Drew Barrymore
and candy sweet -- Reese Witherspoon to MooPig Bureaucrats


(Many thanks to Tidlycove for the idea inspiration for this contest. [browse best gallery pictures] Tag funny pix celebrity chin faces Jackpot: 1st place: $5, 2nd place: $3 , 3rd place: $2 , 4th place: $1 Started: 8/4/2008 5:00:00 PM, Ended: 8/8/2008 1:00:00 AM)

Saturday, June 27, 2009

The Large Hadron Collider
Our understanding of the Universe is about to change...

The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) is a gigantic scientific instrument near Geneva, where it spans the border between Switzerland and France about 100 m underground. It is a particle accelerator used by physicists to study the smallest known particles – the fundamental building blocks of all things. It will revolutionise our understanding, from the minuscule world deep within atoms to the vastness of the Universe.

Two beams of subatomic particles called 'hadrons' – either protons or lead ions – will travel in opposite directions inside the circular accelerator, gaining energy with every lap. Physicists will use the LHC to recreate the conditions just after the Big Bang, by colliding the two beams head-on at very high energy. Teams of physicists from around the world will analyse the particles created in the collisions using special detectors in a number of experiments dedicated to the LHC.

There are many theories as to what will result from these collisions, but what's for sure is that a brave new world of physics will emerge from the new accelerator, as knowledge in particle physics goes on to describe the workings of the Universe. For decades, the Standard Model of particle physics has served physicists well as a means of understanding the fundamental laws of Nature, but it does not tell the whole story. Only experimental data using the higher energies reached by the LHC can push knowledge forward, challenging those who seek confirmation of established knowledge, and those who dare to dream beyond the paradigm.
##########################

Large Hadron Collider to start again, but costs rise in race to discover 'God Particle'
The Large Hadron Collider is to be run flat out throughout the year in order to make up for lost time and to beat an American rival to finding the elusive Higgs Boson – known as the "God Particle".


By Richard Alleyne, Science Correspondent
Published: 7:00AM BST 05 Jun 2009
The £4bn particle accelerator, which broke down last year, was to be turned off in winter to reduce energy demands during peak electricity prices.

But the delays and the news that a smaller less powerful accelerator at Fermilab in Illinois is closing in on the particle has meant it will continue running throughout the year – at an extra cost of £13 million.Dr Lyn Evans, the Welsh scientist who heads the project, said: "It would have been terrible if we'd got everything working and then had to shut it down straight away.

"So we've decided to bite the bullet and keep it going. That means that if the schedule slips by a week or two, it's not so bad. Up until this year that was inconceivable."

Built by the European Organisation for Nuclear Research (CERN), the collider lies beneath the French-Swiss border, near the institution's headquarters in Geneva, at depths ranging from 170ft to 600ft.

The aim of the experiment is to recreate the conditions that existed a fraction of a second after the Big Bang – the birth of the universe – and provide vital clues to the building blocks of life.

It will track the spray of particles thrown out by collisions in a search for the elusive Higgs Boson, a theoretical entity that supposedly lends weight, or mass, to the elementary particles.

So important is this mysterious substance that it has been called the 'God Particle'.

The "big bang machine" is currently being readied for its restart after repairs to the catastrophic fault that shut it down just days after it was switched on last year.

The first beams of particles will be fired around the LHC's 17-mile ring in September and the first collisions will follow about a month later, Dr Evans told the Cheltenham Science Festival.

"I always wish Fermilab good luck, but they will have a hard job now," he added.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Elbows Up :: Side to Side

Popeye Leans Like a Cholo -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOPZR_OwgQs

Handicap Corner Feature This Week: "James Thurber Moment"

Retrieved by Pat Darnell


$50 For the Homeless
I recently asked my friends' seven year old daughter what she wants to be when she grows up. She said 'she wants to be president some day.'

Both of her parents, left wing Democrats, were standing there, so I asked their little innocent girl, "If you were president what would be the first thing you would do?"

"I would give food and houses to all homeless people," she replied.

Her parents beamed.

"Wow... what a worthy goal." I told her, "But you don't have to wait until you're president to do that. You can come over to my house, and mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where homeless guys hang out, and you can give them the $50, you earned, to use toward food and a new house."

She thought that over for a few seconds, then she looked me in the eye and asked, "Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?"

I said, "Welcome to the Republican Party."

"Hrrrrruuumppff, come along Natalie," her parents still aren't speaking to me.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Razor and Eulogy Department:
Michael Jackson -- 1958 - 2009







Occam’s Razor Blender

All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes, to make it possible From: The Seven Pillars of Wisdom SOURCE

Excerpt from blogger altHippo [HERE], "...If Occam’s Razor is the principle that the simplest explanation is preferred over the most fantastic, then what do you call the notion that the most contorted explanation, that also supports one’s ideological viewpoint, is closest to the truth?

As you may guess from the title I’m going with Occam’s Blender. That’s where you cherry-pick facts, add some opinion, a little fantasy, a heaping helping of hackery, and puree until chunky. Then, you serve it in a dirty glass and point out that if you drink the whole thing, you’ll also have consumed some bits of truth in the process..."

MooPig Razor's and Eulogies Department hopes you followed all that... so that now you the reader might answer us:

"So, who drove in the final wood stake?"

I Blog to Differ: Don't Eat the Horse

[No Grotesque Pictures, this time.]




Horses of Differing Colors, and many other Cliches
by Pat Darnell and PETA-L

My goodness patrons!! How do you define protein supplements? I think if I eat a horse meat steak, I should probably become an even larger big dumb animal than I already am... no? Or is it silly to think that we are what we eat; that I am what I eat?
I had two donuts this morning... [attempted segue]
And it's not the first time. [SOURCE]

In March, dozens of horses carcasses were found stripped of their skin and meat and left on the side of the road in Miami, and officials say it's all for the sake of selling the meat on the black market.

Though not illegal to eat in the U.S., the sale of horse meat for human consumption is illegal.

Owners of horses are free to slaughter them for their own meal.

Though not a staple of the American dinner table, equine meat is in high demand by natives of the Caribbean, Cuba and other European countries who crave horse cuisine.

The horse meat can go for as much as $20 per pound on the black market.

The Humane Society of the United States is offering a reward of $2,500 for info leading to an arrest in the killings, and police say they're actively investigating the deaths.
Belgium and France
they love a meat
they can't hide
in their pants,
and that is quite discreet
cuisine as procurement...
Eat More Horse
As it comes usually
from American sources
and not for all tourists
their meat from horses...
gourmet who suck it up...
...to be savvy,


Yes, licking thoroughbreds, and
sopping up horse-hair gravy

from Floridian stables
while watching Ray, Rachel
on tableland cable...
prepare Italian courses...
from untraceable sources...
of butchered filly's
and fondue of horses
Yum!! [SOURCE] (lyric by PD)

Police investigating multiple horse killings
WBBH-TV | updated 9:12 p.m. CT, Thurs., May 14, 2009

Florida police are searching for the suspects behind a string of horse killings.

Two more horse carcasses were found on a small Miramar farm and police believe they were slaughtered for their meat in what is becoming a continuing problem in south Florida.

The horses' owner called police after he found his two animals slaughtered last week, brutally butchered, missing several body parts and laying in pools of blood.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Crunk President [Part One of Forty-two] :: Buzzwords and TLA's



Defiant or just Defiled?
Retrieved HEREby Pat Darnell with Barry O and the Knuckle-Benders

Someone once said:

...I'll never forget in high school, when a friend of mine proudly proclaimed he had started a new job. "I'm a fuel transference technician", he boasted. "What is that?" everyone asked with a puzzled expression. "I pump gas." Amazingly, our daily lives as architects and developers are riddled with similar technology colloquialisms. (SOURCE)"

Bibbidy Bobbidy Boo, Barry, is it Really, Really True?
:: War of the CEO's :::: Or, Cecadas climbing out of the ground Three Years Early :::: Or, CEO beat down all the way back to Jewelry Pawn Broker :::: Attritional Nightmares ::

Introduction of Part ONE -- This quoted article below, retrieved in its entireity, sets the mood for MooPig's urgent vivesectioning today's coporate businesses... climate changes within micro management is on hold while the C-classes hash out their compensations... or caps on incomes. Unless MooPig is reading signs wrongly, signs like crying, whining and diving into the Hudson, -- the top CEO knuckleheads of knuckle inbred industries are knuckling down and running with scarred knuckles dragging the ground.

It is unconfirmed at this hour, but could very well be true, Corporate Exec's are running the Bulls, only the bulls today are Bears; Shareholders are giving exiting top Management and entering Straw Men knuckle-sandwiches. Besides, we didn't know all this was going on; so maybe you don't either... so let us take a white knuckles ride together and learn something about our Crunk Prezident Barry. [pd]
_______________________

Christine Lambden and Casey Conner, authors of "Everyday Practices of Extraordinary Consultants," teach consulting and interviewing skills workshops and seminars around the world. After a combined total of more than 30 years in the consulting industry, they now bring their accumulated wisdom to business professionals in various industries.

Getting along with people sometimes requires speaking their language, especially in the workplace. One of the ways employees try to emphasize their smartness is with specialized vocabulary.

Due to the nature of a lot of people's work, technical language and terminology is often necessary, but buzzwords can make you sound pretentious. On the other hand, if you are working on a team full of buzzword-addicted co-workers, you'll need to fit in. Learning and properly using the latest buzzwords and TLAs ( three-letter abbreviations) can help you create high-bandwidth communication with your colleagues.

Here are 12 of today's hottest quasi-serious workplace phrases:

Boil the ocean
Definition: The scope is too big to do in one project. Break it up into more than one. We often hear, "We're not trying to boil the ocean here..." when the client is trying to keep costs down and avoid an overly ambitious project scope.

Drink the Kool-Aid
Definition: To enthusiastically perform a task or follow a leader without knowing how this may affect you or to buy the "company line" without question. In business, you may hear someone say, "He drank the Kool-Aid," when he means, "He has been thoroughly trained in the program and we have his unconditional support," or "He is on board with our strategy."

In political commentary, it is used to imply that people who disagree with you have been brainwashed or are under the influence of drugs.

Going native
Definition: This is what happens when a consultant stops acting like a consultant and starts thinking he is part of the client organization. If you aren't willing to go somewhere else, go ahead and apply for a permanent job.

You aren't providing the same value you were in the beginning.

Greenfield instance
Definition: Clean, new installation of an application without customizations, configuration or data. When a brand-new application is installed, it is a "greenfield instance" until the consultants and programmers go in and start messing it up with configurations and code changes.

Holistic
Definition: A big-picture view or a solution that includes upstream and downstream impacts. Whatever it means, it's a great consulting word and we use it a lot.

Paradigm
Definition: The perspective or view you have of a situation. For example, "When ownership of our order fulfillment project moved from operations to sales, it caused a paradigm shift that resulted in a whole new project strategy and approach."

Running in parallel
Definition: Processing normal operating data through two systems simultaneously to compare performance and output. When a client is feeling particularly paranoid about a new system that his consultants have developed or implemented, even after exhaustive testing and training, we will sometimes recommend running the new system in parallel with the old for a short period.

Straw man
Definition: First draft of a solution or proposal intended to provoke discussion. It is an object, document, person or argument that temporarily stands in for and is intended to be "knocked down" by something more substantial.

Talking to the dog
Definition: Thinking it through by talking it through out loud. You'll often hear engineers and programmers say that they finally solved a problem by talking to the dog.

Use case
Definition: A particular circumstance or situation in which the solution would be used. For example, when designing a system, the engineer will refer to all the use cases that have been documented to determine if his solution would be effective in each situation.

White paper
Definition: An authoritative report or guide published to share technical or business information, particularly related to solving common problems. Writing white papers is a great way for consultants to get exposure in their industry and develop a reputation for expertise.

Wireframe
Definition: Simple pictures that show a proposed user interface, often used by business analysts to communicate expectations to users and developers.
______________________________
For complete bios, please visit http://www.blogger.com/www.ConsultantingStance.com/about.htm. <--oops... maybe a bad link lost the link...
(Copyright 2009. Christine Lambden and Casey Conner. All rights reserved. The information contained in this article may not be published, broadcast or otherwise distributed without prior written authority. HUHNjH? Story Filed Thursday, June 18, 2009 - 5:55 PM ).

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

I'll be Frank -- Part Deux




Previously: "Virtue is excellence and perfection, just as vice, its contrary, denotes a defect or absence of perfection. In its strictest meaning, however, as used by moral philosophers and theologians, it signifies a habit super-added to a faculty of the soul, disposing it to elicit with readiness acts conformable to our rational nature." (June 9, 2009; HERE)


Tornado Proofing our Family Structures with Virtue
by Pat Darnell

Families are proving ground for young ones learning virtues, simply by providing opposites of virtues. How? For instance, where else can a child learn bribery, graft, usurpation, avarice or jealousy, bargaining, pecking order, time-wasters, and blundering. A child learns early these torments, and how others deal with them -- where else besides in a family of siblings, cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles. As above: "a habit super-added to a faculty of the soul, disposing it to elicit with readiness acts conformable to our rational nature."

For me that little definition implies family life -- no matter how virtuous or not -- is rational. Also, how can one depart from one's soul, and not seek virtues in the presence of one's own family members? Tornadoes will come in whirlwinds of family life, expect them.

Sure, one can read virtue in Shakespeare, or listen to music describe virtue in the remnants of life -- life as work, life as eating, life as sleeping, as history -- birth and death. It turns out, no infant I know can read at her age of one year. That cancels out Shakespeare as a source reference for Baby's dealing with her litter of siblings, cousins, parents and their siblings.... right?

You bet that is right. By age five, supposedly, a child may have locked in what her personality will be. It has to do with birth order, genetic arrangements and the condition of her domicile. No other frame of reference is used that magically dominates a child's condition.

Looking around, but of course, I find no first person narrative has ever been written from the first five years of infancy. Not even the first five years of Jesus's life is written in a first person guide to aid in our development as virtuous family members. However, later Jesus did ask his followers to receive His faith in His next of kin -- God the Father... eh? [Thanks to Garnetgurl]

Like some cultures, we also could consider children of infancy are absolutely in their own communion with their universe. As "beings" not of our world, Virtue is born there, in the secret language of infants.

I realize this is a monster assumption, on many levels, and therefore looks like a conspiracy. My frame of reference comes from observation of our six children. I sincerely hope our men-children and women-children transcend my assumption, and prove someday where virtue really does spawn. I only ask that some how we at last apply -- continually -- virtues, for which there is no law against, in our lives as family members. I know in my heart there is plenty room for improvement in all resolve of stormy times amongst family people.

There can be no harm in exploring possibilities of tornado proofing our domiciles with virtues purchased and forwarded by our ancestry; and should we invite an elephant into our Living Room, we should at least discuss it's presence there... no?

Monday, June 22, 2009

Why Ikki Peed Ya: Hedy Lamarr, yo, Scientist -- Part ONE




"So, You Want to be a Celebrity, and Smart?!"
Another MooPig Cut\Paste Series

Pat. Pending and a life of Litigations
by Pat Darnell and the Hedy Lamarr Fan Club

Frequency-Hopping Spread-Spectrum Invention

Avant garde composer George Antheil, a son of German immigrants and neighbor of Lamarr, had experimented with automated control of musical instruments, including his music for Ballet Mecanique, originally written for Fernand L├ęger's 1924 abstract film. This score involved multiple player pianos playing simultaneously.

Together, Antheil and Lamarr submitted the idea of a secret communication system in June 1941. On August 11, 1942, U.S. Patent 2,292,387was granted to Antheil and "Hedy Kiesler Markey", Lamarr's married name at the time. This early version of frequency hopping used a piano roll to change between 88 frequencies and was intended to make radio-guided torpedoes harder for enemies to detect or jam.

The idea was ahead of its time, and not feasible owing to the state of mechanical technology in 1942. It was not implemented in the USA until 1962, when it was used by U.S. military ships during a blockade of Cuba[6] after the patent had expired. Neither Lamarr nor Antheil, who died in 1959, made any money from the patent. Perhaps owing to this lag in development, the patent was little-known until 1997, when the Electronic Frontier Foundation gave Lamarr an award for this contribution.

Lamarr's and Antheil's frequency-hopping idea serves as a basis for modern spread-spectrum communication technology, such as COFDM used in WiFi network connections and CDMA used in some cordless and wireless telephones.
Similar patents had been granted to others earlier, such as in Germany in 1935 to Telefunken engineers Paul Kotowski and Kurt Dannehl who also received U.S. Patent 2,158,662 and U.S. Patent 2,211,132 in 1939 and 1940. Blackwell, Martin and Vernam's Secrecy Communication System patent from 1920 (1598673) does seem to lay the communications groundwork for Kiesler and Antheil's patent which employed the techniques in the autonomous control of torpedoes.

Lamarr wanted to join the National Inventors Council, but she was told that she could better help the war effort by using her celebrity status to sell War Bonds. She once raised $7,000,000 at just one event.

In 1998, a vector illustration of Lamarr's face was used by Corel Corporation on the packaging and in the publicity for its CorelDRAW 8 software. Lamarr sued Corel for damages relating to unauthorized use of her likeness. The case was resolved in 1999 and settled out of court for an undisclosed sum, under terms that allowed Corel five years of exclusive rights to the image.

In 2003, the Boeing corporation ran a series of recruitment ads featuring Hedy Lamarr as a woman of science. No reference to her film career was made in the ads.

In 2005, the first Inventor's Day in German-speaking countries was held in her honor on November 9, on what would have been her 92nd birthday.

Dr. Kleiner, a fictional scientist in Valve Software's acclaimed game Half-Life 2, has a pet headcrab that he names after her.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Tit for Tatt: Stars become Scars on a Face



"When a Tattoo hits your face, like Big Pizza plates; That's a Stupido..." Misheard lyrics (also called mondegreens) occur when people misunderstand the lyrics in a song. These are NOT intentional rephrasing of lyrics, which is called parody.
This following story contains misheard requests, or not, and that is called "Litigation."
Well, someone heard the wrong instructions:

Thanks to our Special Friend, Sans Direction -- Borrowed Obsession: Mindless Yobs In The News, for pointing this one out:
Retrieved HERE

I'll pay for half those star tattoos to be removed, says the man who engraved 56 on 18-year-old girl's face
By Mail Foreign Service

The tattooist embroiled in a row with a teenage girl who claims he tattooed 56 stars on her face when she only asked for three has said he will help pay for them to be removed.

Rouslan Toumaniantz said today that Kimberley Vlaminck 'absolutely' agreed she wanted 56 stars tattooed on the left side of her face.

But now the 18-year-old is suing Toumaniantz, claiming she had asked him for only three stars - and had fallen asleep during the procedure, waking up to a nightmare in her Belgian hometown of Courtrai.

Toumaniantz - himself covered from head to foot in tattoos and piercings - said he would help pay for half of the treatment to remove the tattoos.

'I maintain that she absolutely agreed that I tattoo those 56 stars on the left side of her face,' he told newspaper La Derniere Heure.

'A witness, a woman who was present, has already been questioned by police, and she confirms it.

'But be that as it may: Kimberley is unhappy and it is not my wish to have an unsatisfied client. There is a way to remove the tattoos with the help of a laser. I accept to pay for half the cost.'

Toumaintz, who runs the tattoo parlour called The Tattoo Box in Courtrai, said Kimberley was awake and actually looked in the mirror several times during the procedure to see how it was going.

He said she knew 'exactly what she wanted'.

'The trouble all started when she went home and her father and boyfriend threw a fit.

'They are saying things now like I doped her or hypnotised her. What rubbish!

'She asked for 56 stars and that’s what she got.'

To remove the stars would require surgery costing £8,500.

But even the most advanced laser techniques would, while removing the tattoos, leave deep white marks all across Kimberley's face.

She has launched legal proceedings against Toumanaintz seeking damages, plus the money for the operation.

He was questioned by police earlier this year but they decided it was a civil matter and that there was nothing they could do.

Jules Clocher, a Belgian psychologist, said: 'The trauma this girl must be feeling is indescribable. She feels like a circus freak - and no wonder, because she looks like one.'

Toumanaintz said from now on he will get written consent from clients before he begins tattooing.

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