Interview Before the Rapture

7-1/2 Minute Lunch-break Interviews
by MooPig da' Furst

Today we will be interviewing Jaupeen Dooley. We hold these lunch time interviews with passers-by in hopes to randomly tap into a stream of thought that interests you -- our beloved readers.

:: Hello Sir; Who are you?

-- I'm not the Chosen One; I'm not special; and I'm no one in particular... just Jaupeen Dooley.

:: Okay, that explains who you are not... You are correct that no information follows your name on this list I have. Today our subject is Magic. Do you believe in Magic?

-- That would depend on the Magic I think. Sometimes I think my heart is Magic.

:: Are you married Mr Dooley?

-- Yes.

:: Any children?

-- Yes we have six children. Our third oldest is getting married next year.

:: What do you do?

-- Google, mostly.

:: Oh. That is an odd answer. That is all you do? It sounds like a door of diminishing return when you say it like that.

-- Yes ...

:: Like a predestined irony, like D[ungeons] and D[ragons] role playing online?

-- No ...

:: Then other?

-- Other?

:: Other online things like endless libido games or the "other," like porn...?

-- No, none of that. Although I understand your question.

:: I mean porn like shade tree mechanic thing, or shadow internet stuff?

-- Yes I get it. No I don't have interest in those.

What I Google is oddity. That's what interests me. If I play a game I play it rapidly to get to the statistics from empirical data that is produced in playing. For example; Poker, err 21, I would find a way to play five thousand hands in an hour just to get to end results of win\loss\push percentiles.. that sort of playing.

:: So you do play games?

-- Yes, but I have inside me these notions about String Theory. I perceive, for instance, a correlation between rising Brain Industries and our academic foray into String Theory. Googling helps me get past the usual lag times of these things... get that, eh?

:: That is more than a game Mr Dooley. It's a lot, actually. Are you a frustrated academician?

-- Sure! Isn't everyone? 'fer instance What would you point to if I asked you what living thing on earth might easily establish a strong emotional tie with you?

:: A human ... a child.

-- Oops; sorry I mean other than another human.

:: I don't know. What do you say, or point to?

-- I would point to my pet -- my puppy. I had a first puppy when I was only four and her name was Baby. I can still feel her tangled long fur in my hands. I can still remember her squirmy little body. Now I have a larger puppy with feel all her own. And of course the feel of your own children have this same lingering emotional sense in us all.

:: And this has what to do with your Google pastime?

-- Good question! I would say it is Google-worthy because it does not cause any affliction or barrier. To keep a personal tie, or emotional tie, with all correlations that interest me -- gives me more control over why-when-how  things go in my days. I can stay on track with my feelings as there is always this "play room" - Google - to go to. It is like a room that I visit. 

:: That is seven and a half minutes and concludes our lunch break interview with you; do you have anything else you want to add?

-- Yes, only this: there are millions of people out there who are oblivious to the opportunity offered by our Google-ized Internet. Many are retired Boomers, and they have no sense of how this all works to their benefit. It is either a joke or a thing to be feared.

It is time to ask the untold millions with their terrabytes of memories and emotional ties "do you want to have your own room to sort it out?"

Thank you all for joining us in this Thursday 7-1/2 Minute Lunch Break Interview with Mr Jaupeen Dooley -- Googler.
This is MooPig da' Furst bidding you good afternoon.
*
*