MooPig Mercantile Department :: "Meteorites"

It Shattered Windows and Injured Thousands
Retrieved by Pat Darnell  |  Feb 19, 2013  |  Bryan TX

[Picture LINK]

Rubles from heaven: Russians scoop up meteorite chunks for sale - latimes.com:   ... "They're calling it the meteorite rush.

Prices asked for purported pieces of the alien visitor range from $20 to $30,000.

Typical Ad:

“For sale: a piece of meteorite. Cures cancer, AIDS and prostate. Improves academic performance at school, “ reads one ad, which was posted under the name Yevgeny and is perhaps overreaching a bit. He is asking $10,000 for his space rock, without specifying its size."

'via Blog this'

Russia's massive meteorite: By the numbers ... the big space rock that crashed into the Ural Mountains last week was the largest in a century, and worth more than its weight in gold ...

55 -- Diameter of the meteorite, in feet, according to NASA

10,000 -- Weight of the meteorite, in tons

500 -- Amount of energy, in kilotons, put out by the meteor as it neared Earth — 30 times the energy of the atomic bomb that struck Hiroshima

40,000 -- Estimated speed of Friday's meteor, in miles per hour, before crashing, according to Russian space agency Roscosmos

567 -- Typical cruising speed of a Boeing 747, in miles per hour

25 -- Diameter, in feet, of a hole in frozen Lake Chebarkul, believed to be where a large chunk crashed through the ice

53 -- "Small, stony, black objects," confirmed as meteorite fragments, that scientists have recovered so far from around Lake Chebarkul

$2,220 -- Price per gram of recovered fragments of the meteorite — 40 times the price of gold — according to Dmitry Kachkalin, a member of the Russian Society of Amateur Meteorite Lovers

5,000 -- Rough estimate of known meteors 100 feet in diameter or bigger that could hit Earth,

... according to NASA Sources: Bloomberg Businessweek, CNN, Guardian, Reuters, Space dot com, Wall Street Journal, Wired

" ... The best bet, Ford [Mark Ford, a longtime collector who is chairman of the British and Irish Meteorite Society] says, is to buy from a dealer who is a member of the International Meteorite Collectors Association, a self-policing group of dealers. Ordinarily, after a major meteorite fall, “the dealers are on the next plane,” he says. “But this being Russia, it’s a bit more difficult. They have to get visas, and there are some security issues because Chelyabinsk is a nuclear city.” (Carol Matlack on February 19, 2013. LINK) ... "

____________________Reference
http://theweek.com/article/index/240276/russias-massive-meteorite-by-the-numbers
http://www.latimes.com/news/world/worldnow/la-fg-wn-russians-scoop-up-meteorites-20130219,0,327561.story
http://www.businessweek.com/articles/2013-02-19/first-came-the-russian-meteor-now-the-meteorite-deals
http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2013/feb/18/hunt-russian-meteorite-fragments-comet
http://www.reuters.com/article/2013/02/18/us-russia-meteorite-idUSBRE91E05Z20130218
http://www.space.com/19847-russian-meteorites-found-chelyabinsk-fireball.html
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424127887323764804578312264130040432.html
http://www.wired.com/dangerroom/2013/02/russia-meteor/
http://www.imca.cc/

Found: WMD's

by Pat Darnell, Adler Peabody, and others


"It has been staring us in the faces for the whole time..."

Yep, right there on the brows of all old hairy men in the Mideast, Afghanistan, Dubai and in some East European Countries: EYEBROWS

"It came to me when My wife leapt up on my chest with a tweezers in her hand, and said: 'I'm going to pluck those deadly weapons!'"


Said former Secretary to the Deputy Assistant, Adler Peabody, "I called my old department and they called the Iraqi Front. Suddenly as if scales were falling from the eyes of our fighting men and women -- it became clear where the Weapons of Mass Destruction had been hiding all these years," recanted Adler.

Sec Peabody had resigned his post 18 months ago after having been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. His revelation came as he is in recovery under care at the Veterans Hospital in Wisconsin. "I have been given some new revolutionary drugs for my disorder," he said.

You see the truth is that as the hairline recedes, the eyebrows become more 'aggressive' so to speak. See for yourselves in the photo's left.

The State Department has no comment for us today. Our intelligence reports have been able to trace the 'brilliant hiding place' all the way back to the Irish Republican Army, the IRA, when some collaboration between IRA Sleeper Cells and Muslim Deep Napping Cells took place in Irish Pubs around the world.

"Yeah, ya bloody Wanker," explains one old timer IRA Operative, Paddy OMalley, now owner Bar Man at the Corner Pull. "We used to put WMD's on the hairy parts on the back of our hands. Then at some point we would back-hand those Muslim brothers in the eye."

"Do you remember any particulars?" asked MooPig Correspondent.

"Mind ya, this was before Carter Days over in the States. We didn't have any of that hot-spot, bloody laptop hook ups, or this tea-sippin' coffee-sluggin' potato-brain nightmares..." OMalley was beside himself and couldn't go on.

Our correspondent took another look around the Corner Pull. There were no laptops or coffee cups around. The place still had heavy timbers coated with beer splash, and wooden planked floors with huge blood stains, and peanut shells ground into it as a sort of patina. "From the looks of it, you have kept the place looking very authentic, Mr OMalley," said our correspondent.

"Yes, of course, ya Bugger. So anyways, one evening, A Nun, a Priest and a Sheik all walked into this here Corner Pull. I was sitting right here that night, too. And right after them in walks the New Zealand All Blacks, and the Ireland Rugby Club fresh from a draw game that lasted two days. It had been the whisper that a very large shipment of WMD'd were to be transferred that night."

"And..."

"Oh, yeah, the first thing the Bar Man said to me, 'Is this some kind of a joke?'" said OMalley, chuckling to himself.

"And the brawl that ensued was a remarkable thing to watch, if ya' survived. There's even a song sung to this day at most IRA and IRC meets about that night. You see, the Nun, well -- she were no lady."

Next Week: The Song

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