Coming Soon, another Dog's Life Picture Essay: Starring :> and Dog food Recalls
Sunday, December 13, 2009
A Friend's Dog's Life Picture Essay
Coming Soon, another Dog's Life Picture Essay: Starring :> and Dog food Recalls
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Response to Pribek.net :: Slash Solo Stuff and Other Cats with Hats
Maybe you've noticed Jeff Dunham who has brought dummy-ism back to TV...
And for you lip-locked performers, here is a site I just found:
Breakdancing Facial Expression Lessons. How to make ventriloquist-dummy worthy expressions while breakin'. (From Veronica Vinegar - NSFW). Tutorials for learning breakdance moves [HERE]
-- OR --
Sunday, April 26, 2009
They CONK you on the Head !!
by MooPig Ads Council

Pirates on the high-seas lay in waiting to charge at your freighter, your ship that is as long as the Chrysler Building is tall, and they storm into your seven story high bridge tower, and CONK you on your head.
They scream, and shoot up the place, and scream some more asking, "Where is the Manifests?"
One problem though, you cannot understand what they say, due to your iron ear that can't understand heavy accents. Your inability landed you this job as ships mate in the first place; now it is giving you multiple bloody bumps on your head...
Thinking to yourself: "If only I could understand what they say, I would give them what they want...!"

That is why you Need --

"BAR NONE Lingoismistic Ergonomic Pirate'ease ADVANCED Learning TAPES"
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PHOTO's: [Middle] ORDER IN THE NEXT THIRTY MINUTES and receive Limited Offer Posters with your Purchase... "You say JUMP: I say How High?" and exclusive "1923 Self-defense grappling moves Poster" for every Punjabi aboard your vessel....
selling products within four product categories: Back-to-school ... Romances ... Pirate-ease ... and Animal Do Speak Little ...AVAILABLE AT -- Thesaurus Linguae Romanae Et Britannicae - Moogle Books --
by Thomas Cooper, Henri Estienne, Henry Denham -- Foreign Language Study - 1808 pages --
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TELL THEM MooPig SENT YOU and receive a twelve pack of buck shot....Magnum... with every new tape.
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Me Down, ask me again and I'll knock YOU down.Very Fine Print ... Prices may vary as Demand Increases ... Remember RoboCop will not always be there to protect you.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
One Day at the Middle School Bizarre...
Sent: Monday, June 30, 2008 3:35 PM
To: Jason Thomas
Subject:
This letter was sent to the principals office after a middle school had sponsored a luncheon for the elderly. An old lady had received a new radio at the lunch as a door prize, and was writing to say thank you. This story is a credit to all human kind. Forward to anyone you know who might need a lift today!
Dear Faculty and Students,
God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens' luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at an assisted home for the aged. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone now and it's nice to know someone is thinking of me. God bless you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady. My roommate is 95 and always had her own radio. Before I received this one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping. The other day, her radio fell off the night stand and broke into a lot of little pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. She asked if she could listen to mine, and finally I could say to that stingy bitch, fuck you.
Thank you for that opportunity.
Sincerely,
Agnes
[thanks to Dan of the Century, tile]
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A Fantastically Flawed Script for a Jazz Rock Opera -- "GAZA"
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