WHEW!!! UPDATE: WTPh ?

PHOTO: Phelps Bonging

Hey, that's just a Clarinet !!
Retrieves by Pat Darnell

[SOURCE]
Well, the Weekly World News, famous for finding compromising photos of people, has gotten their hands on a doozie. Here's a photo they managed to snag of Mr. Gold Medal Michael Phelps hitting a bong at the University of South Carolina back in November during a down time in the swim season when he wasn't going to be drug tested.

Apparently Phelps was visiting yet another girlfriend at the school or something. And word was he was a pro with the bong.

Naturally the Weekly World News does it's best to mention how this photo will kill Phelps' endorsement opportunities. Really? He got a DUI when he was 19, which is about 300 times worse than smoking weed, and that hasn't exactly hurt him.

Plus, he's 23, has 14-gold-medals, and he's an international celebrity. We should be glad the worst picture of Phelps out there is him hitting a bong, rather than him doing lines off of a hooker's back. Cut the man some slack.

UPDATE: Phelps has since apologized, but didn't actually admit to smoking pot.
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Larry King, for instance --- did you know
In 1971 talk show host, Larry King, a noted degenerate gambler in Miami at the time, was arrested after failing to pay back money he owed. King was originally charged with Grand Larceny. He later pled guilty to bad check charges. King owed money to so many people, at the time, that a Miami radio station once printed bumper stickers that said, “Honk if Larry King Owes You Money.”

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***UPDATED February 3rd, 9:05AM*** Michael Phelps has so far emerged unscathed from the controversy created by the photo showing him smoking from a bong, with his sponsors still standing behind him. However, he still could face criminal charges if it's determined that he was smoking marijuana, which shouldn't be too difficult considering there's a photo and Phelps has already confessed:

Richland County Sheriff Leon Lott says he will charge Michael Phelps with a crime if he determines the Olympics hero smoked marijuana in Richland County...


...Possession of marijuana is a misdemeanor, punishable by up to 30 days in jail or a $570 fine, plus court costs.

Team Rally Speech

Managing Project Risk and Opportunities
Monitor, Leverage, and a bit of Respect By Patrick Darnell

Introduction

Now that Project X is in Early Start Mode because of inducements supporting fast delivery of the prototype, Project Risk Management must further its mission. There is a notion among stakeholders that massive amounts of substitutions have been made in critical areas of controls, especially wireless and fiber optics. Also, for security reasons military IT mesh network system of Project X does not align with standard, popular IT. Internet Technology and Engineering is backlogged with shop drawings, comparing them to specified units. The departments called in an army of temps to get back on target, by increasing hours using two shifts.

Manufactured piece parts ordered from Poland are on schedule but held up in special coating factories at Swedish plants in Romania. Stainless steel production is experiencing slow downs and shut downs in Eastern Europe. The manufacturers are renegotiating prices since the US dollar is plummeting, with two years to go in the Bush administration. Sounds like bad news? It isn’t because Project Risk Management Plan, PMP, saw those coming.

The test now is to winnow concurring risks that are waiting in the wings like villains who sweep in, to ruin the baking of the pie, putting their thumbs all in it. This is also not bad news because the Project Manager Office, PMO, has put together team monitoring and controlling processes to make early identification of unanticipated stumbling blocks falling from the ceilings.

Discussion: who monitors the Monitoring?

As will have been instilled in new Project Risk Team Managers, we will have an unusual opportunity to combine already learned processes of previous risk management parlays, with newer identification of enduring stalactites like risk-plagues common to all early-start projects. The key seems to be respect, as a proper spelunker knows; do not touch the conical hanging pillar hanging over your head; let it be. Two reasons for respectful delayed reaction:

· Each risk has a life cycle, like a project, and if disturbed too early or too late will likely end in disaster
· Latent Risk hanging over one’s head is what makes the project flourish, in other words is the prime motivation

It turns out “keeping track of identified risks, re-analyzing existing risks, monitoring trigger conditions for contingency plans, monitoring residual risks, reviewing and evaluating the effectiveness of risk responses” is ongoing by PMO reporting agents. And, make reports every shift changeover if possible. Reporting three times daily is very possible with wireless and radio frequency identification, RFID, and many other tactical Internet Technology, IT, based products.

The process is self iterate, according to Douglas B Boebinger, PMP, founder and President of Integrated Process Developers Inc, a project management and process re-engineering consultant and corporate trainer. After checking the overall plan to note if our response is clicking with core competency, and accepted standard mode of operation: ~Create workarounds, ~Control the project risks, and ~Refine and update the risk response plan.
This is very respectful spelunking when the risk, or stalactite, is worked around, and preserved for what it is, a relic, in a safe and controlled environment. This quarantine allows properly timed managing of latent risks.

Discussion: Iterative Teamwork

What then is the reaction that will seal the fortune of early start Project X in regards monitoring and processing of latent risk? First we discern external or internal root of incoming risks. From there we apply our guided “Risk Management Paradigm: Communicate ~ Identify ~ Analyze ~ Plan ~ Track ~ Control,” (Dorofee; Apr 97) and;
Implement an alternate strategy
· Execute a fallback strategy
· Modify the PMP
· Take corrective measures
· Update organizational process assets
· Puts lessons-learned in computer database for future use

Jump-starting the risk evaluation during tasks depends very much on the project management team and its reciprocal interdependence. Extreme teams can be formed where “ordinary people are called upon to achieve extraordinary results, and ...not be burned out when they are done” (Thompson; 2004).

In the 1990’s Mrs. Thompson points out that “134 separate project teams in 88 countries in the USA ...indicated that ‘despite positive indicators... overall results show companies [were] generally doing a poor job of team building’”(2004; p 72). Despite the team’s mission internal dynamics will be done in three phases:

• Task Analysis: what work needs to be done?
• People: how many people should be on the team?
• And, Relationships: What roles are implicitly negotiated among team members?” (2004; p 73)

Please, lead risk Management team members, oblige your self to remember to bring in other persons to your latent risk identification process, as it makes higher probable recognition of threats. Accomplish interpersonal work through well-planned facilitated group meetings, and individual interviews. Keep the I.D. process simply “known/ unknown, important/ unimportant, external/ internal, or predictable/ unpredictable” (CTUOnline Task Multimedia PPT; Dec 8, 2006)

Team Risk Management should keep the edge on and capture the vehemence of the project workers and sponsors to accomplish this prototype early finish. Remember to structure your interview questions to your best understanding of psychology of your guest, and to power of listening by you the interviewer. Allow the workers and teams to vent, and otherwise stay loose in the environment of the interviews and meetings. I trust you will all capture and document all that is to be discovered in your sessions. The interviewees are reaching into their past experiences in context of what’s happening now, to give you a glimpse of the next round of situations (Para, CTUOnline Task Multimedia PPT; Dec 8, 2006).

Conclusion

In conclusion the struggle upfront to instill risk management is beginning to pay off. When sponsors came in project management’s first meetings they wanted not much to do with the qualitative research needed to identify major risks. Yet, now that it has been done, and is ongoing done, almost everyone in the entire project from Poland to Thailand cannot wait to tout their latest brain-surge that identifies upon the horizon an incursive risk. At last we all know what it means to say, “We welcome the unwelcome intrusion with its usually unpleasant and damaging effects.”

References

CTUOnline Task Multimedia PPT; (Dec 8, 2006) questions and answers
CTUOnline, (October 2006) Task Detail, HRM345-0604A-05: Building Effective Teams
Boebinger, DOUGLAS B, PMP (Dec 2006) CTU Online, Risk Management Tricks of the Trade for Project Managers, Rita Mulcahy, PMP dbb process developers Integrated Process Developers Inc
Dorofee, Audrey J, Walker, Julie A, and Williams, Ray C; (Apr 97) Risk Management in Practice, SEI, Carnegie Mellon U, retrieved 12/7/2006
Thompson, Leigh L; (2004) Making the Team, a guide for Managers, Prentice / Pearson Hall, Upper Saddle River, NJ, second edition

Top Five Ads for Super Bowls

5. Monster.com “When I Grow Up …” (1999): A group of kids stare at the camera and declare their desire to “have a brown nose,” “be a yes man” and “claw my way up to middle management.”

What worked: Kids are cute, and even cuter when reciting lines such as, “When I grow up … I want to be forced into early retirement.” It was great brand recognition for the new company.

The results: Monster survived the dot-com implosion and despite a stock controversy in 2006 has become a prosperous company that employs close to 5,000 people worldwide.

4. Reebok “Terry Tate: Office Linebacker” (2003): To boost productivity, a CEO recruits a linebacker from Reebok to slam into a series of “Office Space”-style cubicle drones.

What worked: A series of brutal hits, punctuated by lines such as, “Break was over 15 minutes ago, Mitch!” made this the best Super Bowl ad of the last five years.

The results: Terry Tate got people talking about Reebok for something other than sweatshop controversies. The company provides shoes for all the major sports and hosts clothing lines for rappers Jay-Z and 50 Cent.

3. E*Trade “Monkey” (2000): Two dim-witted guys and a monkey clap to some cha-cha music in a garage, followed by the punch line: “Well we just wasted 2 million bucks. What are you doing with your money?”

What worked: Easily the cheapest ad of the year to produce, it was an instant classic —remaining self-deprecating about dot-com excess while lampooning the well-publicized cost of Super Bowl ad time.

The results: The marketing Gods have a way of punishing tech companies that blow too much money on flashy ads. (See: Pets.com. Or don’t. They haven’t been around since 2000.) E*Trade lost hundreds of millions of dollars in 2001 and 2002, and the company's shares — once trading at more than $60 — dropped below $3 in 2002. The company has since bounced back to profitability.

2. Coke “Mean Joe Greene” (1979): A kid offers his Coca-Cola to a battle-weary “Mean Joe” Greene — who softens up enough to toss his jersey as a reward.

What worked: A cute kid with a soft drink was the perfect foil for the surly Greene. Grown men still burst into tears when thinking about “Mean Joe” throwing that jersey.

The results: The ad became an instant pop culture classic, boosting Greene’s career. Among the offshoots was the inspiring “The Steeler and the Pittsburgh Kid” — perhaps the first hourlong TV movie in history to be based on a one-minute commercial.

1. Apple “1984” (1984): A jogger representing Apple throws a sledgehammer into a giant Big Brother image representing IBM — promising a populist shift in the future of personal computers.

What worked: With “Blade Runner” director Ridley Scott in charge, the ad generated more hype — and post-game water cooler talk — than any television commercial in history. Do you even remember who played in the Super Bowl in 1984? (L.A. Raiders and Washington.) You almost certainly remember the biggest Super Bowl ad of the year.

The results: The most storied Super Bowl ad of all time might have boosted sales of George Orwell books, hot red running shorts and sledgehammers. But it didn’t do much for the Macintosh — Apple continues to be the Reform Party of computer manufacturers. Maybe there was a storage locker filled with iPods behind that huge video screen?

Honorable mentions: Pepsi “Apartment 10G” (1987); Pepsi “Diner” (1995); Pepsi “Sucked in” (1995); Mountain Dew “Bad Cheetah” (2000); Budweiser “Magic Fridge” (2006).

Peter Hartlaub covers pop culture for the San Francisco Chronicle.

What do you want for Christmas on your Planet?

We need a break-through. Let's make a splash; don't forget it's summertime somewhere in the world.--9:01pm
PATRICK.DARNELL: Please fill out the following information for Santa Claus: Gazillionaire Worksheet II
A. At the start of turn #6, record the following from the menu of the planet you are on.
1. Name of your company:___________________________
2. Name of the planet you are on:______________________
3. Cargo - identify the cargo on your ship by looking in the “marketplace”:
________________________________________________
4. How many tons of cargo are you carrying? ___________________
5. How much money have you got? (Don’t forget to count any money you
have in the bank)
______________________________
6. Do you owe Mr. Zinn money? (circle one) yes no
If “yes”, how much do you owe?___________________
How much interest did you pay last week to Mr. Zinn? ______________
7. Do you have any loans out from the bank? yes no
If yes, how much?______________ Amount of interest paid last
week:_____________
8. On the planet you are currently on, what is the planet special being offered? go to “explore planet” and then click on “planet special”.)--9:04pm

PATRICK.DARNELL: Final note and I will go: Especially submit how much you all are going to pay out...

It's Christmas Eve, and we are contemplating that million dollar idea, right team? Remember greater is to give than to receive. You all have my best wishes, and warmest regards for this, another Christmas Eve, 2006. God Bless you! >>PD

Global Position Mission

Charter Member RED Team

Opportunity Abroad: Must be targeted
Following the Basics of Principles of Marketing, global or anywhere in the universe, Customers and Markets are made of these things:
Product
Distribution
Promotion
Price
Introduction: Global Position Mission
Somewhere in the infinite body of knowledge that is market research may lay the answer for any business success in the face of adversity. The three I's of success are innovation, ingenuity, and indomitability. The Owner and Stakeholders are pushing the boundaries of technical innovation for exploring holistic systems, devising and executing business strategies and goals. An ideal of successful marketing in global terms is the determination propelling JavaJoy Inc forward in its business. Consider these tips and tools for global strategy decisions, in context of partnering with Multinational Corporations, as means to JavaJoy Inc’s future home.
Questions to Consider
How resistant is the owner and stakeholders of JavaJoy to doing business completely differently, with a new partner?
Is the current domestic business of JavaJoy resistant to change greater in scale than the pressure of urgency to start plans for global expansion? Or, is the executive willing to spread the news to its present workforce?
Is the path to global expansion brave, determined, and impossible to defeat or paved in risk to frighten and dissuade?
Those suffering risk aversion are not the first choice for starting foreign business strategies, or partnering with. Is the firm ready to recruit new people?
The development of business strategy from a position of strength will propel the firm into the international markets they desire. Preparations must be done with least disruption possible. Is the firm willing to play a subordinate role in this mission?
Some Companies that are already in the country of choice, such as Hilton is with its "370,000 rooms worldwide with catering services" make the transition easily. The question is "How does Hilton forecast global demand for its product and services?"(EWeek; June 19, 2006).
Hilton "imports data from six systems into one data warehouse that requires 7 million rows, running on Microsoft SQL Server 2005, and analyzing 1.4 million records a day" (2006). How much buy-in is JavaJoy willing to front in IT and other system upgrades?
Is JavaJoy willing to re-define its business in context of global partnership? Thus, like Eric Lundquist says: ...some claim all the talk about 1.0, 2.0, and 3.0 versions of anything is simply marketing spin ...I argue that a new set of characteristics does require a new definition. (EWeek; June 19, 2006, Pp. 10)
Does JavaJoy Inc require alignment with their own markets before taking on a partner? If so these will be asked of the potential partners: Ask four key questions, that are similar to all previous primary problem areas:
What do we know now about our markets, our market opportunities, and our own strategic and marketing goals?
What are the best marketing and operational opportunities as we understand them now?
How can we frame our marketing and strategic options based on what we know now?
What do we need to know that we do not know now -- about strengths, weaknesses, our products, our markets, and our customers?

How willing is JavaJoy to adopt a broad view of Marketing Intelligence? At (Blog)red we use the "Intelligence Platform with three components: data, ideas, and management drivers." Will JavaJoy compromise its quality standards for partnership privilege?
How willing is JavaJoy to pinpoint decision-making to drive market research objectives and design? How much share of cost in intense, primary research is JavaJoy willing to pay?
Even after shouldering expenses in primary research, is JavaJoy willing to pay for more to answer: Do we have solid marketing information, or is more funds for market research needed?
Does the partner being considered for global diffusion have a strong customer base of US citizens who are looking for the familiar as they travel to foreign lands as tourists and business agents?
Is the executive at JavaJoy willing to talk to enough firms until they find several with which they are comfortable? And, wait long enough to obtain background materials, references or examples of past work?
Decisions of the magnitude that JavaJoy is suggesting do not come without problems. As mentioned before, the elected company leaders, VP's, CFO, President, and the advisors who are on the tangent of global venture must identify the strengths within their business that makes transparency possible. Does JavaJoy believe Transparency is their position of strength?
Global leaders establish structured goals. Why structured? The goal as practiced must withstand both implicit and explicit threats abroad. The goals must be accomplished easily, and become the "open standard." Do the leaders of JavaJoy believe its Technology will be structured, as mentioned before, to support say, the first goal of "Creditworthiness?"
Having sufficient credit backed with austerity and technology is the first and most important tool in the toolbox. Does JavaJoy have in place technology that will cope with inflows/ outflows of cash in differing denominations?
Do JavaJoy's gathered planners make goals that in principle will thwart crisis and global hegemony or subjugation?
Can JavaJoy remain functional in crisis where there is interruption in cash-flows throughout the supply chain, and to creditors?
The analysis will most probably be inconclusive, but it is on record that the process is started. When JavaJoy Inc proceeds will it go with its advisors from say: "JP Morgan, Goldman Sachs or Morgan Stanley to ensure market makers have a common interest from the start (Strong, Norman; 7/12/2006)?"
Conclusion
In context of market research management the corollaries do after all exist between Basic Principles of Marketing and the impulse to find a partner for global incursion. The previous list of questions needs further refinement if a path to partnership is desired by the firm, JavaJoy Inc.
References
Lundquist, Eric, E. D.; eWeek, June 19, 2006; Ziff Davis Media, front cover, MacDonald, John go eWeek com web log
Vass, Will; VP, CIO Sun Microsystems, eWeek, June 19, 2006
Thompson, David; CIO Symantec, eWeek, June 19, 2006
Strong, Norman; 7/12/2006, How to default: a primer, leftbusinessobserver
Griffin, Ricky W, and Pustay, Michael W; International Business, a Managerial Perspective, fourth Edition, 2005, Pearson/ Prentice Hall, Upper Saddle river, NJ


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Project Stakeholders: Do Not Ignore

Project Risk Management
“Who are the project stakeholders? Keep in mind that you work for a publicly-owned company and the customer is the Department of Defense” (CTUOnline; 2006).
• Apply the basic competencies of the project manager in understanding and planning for risk
• Use effective communication techniques.
• Communicate risk effectively to all project stakeholders (CTUOnline; 2006)
According to chapter 2 of the PMBOK guide, the “Projects and project management are carried out in environments broader than that of the project itself” (PMBOK Guide; 2004, p 19).
The project stakeholder organization is made up of those who front the resources, and back the bonds and funds to make the projects possible. The ones who own a stake in the monetary underwriting of projects are often called, stakeholders or sponsors. Also, as described in section 2.2 PMBOK Guide, the interdependence of the project management and the stakeholders is prevailing, and immediate (2004, p 25-26).
Essentially, the sponsors whether individuals or organizations, are willing to risk involvement and funds to see the project completed. Project management teams are obliged to “determine [stakeholders’] requirements and expectations” and proportion the measured risks accordingly. The goal is to “ensure a successful project” (2004, p 25-26).
The most feared word in the relationship between stakeholder and project management is: ignore. The stakeholders and sponsors have started the ball rolling, and it is imperative they contribute throughout the project life cycle. Smartly the Project Manager, who is the captive liaison for the project continuity, must never fail to update, and reiterate essential knowledge to the stakeholders. Expect dramatic damage reports should one ignore the other.
Therefore, in this instance of project length of 5 years or more, and resource provided by hefty supply chains, the stakeholder list is rather extensive. The best placement of the stakeholder is in the shared values and norms of each knowledge base in the project. Therefore the sponsors vary according to the category of their financial responsibilities.
In larger category the stakeholders are the Project Management Organization, and the Customer/ End-user of our Department of Defense project. The cross-functioning influences of multiple categorical stakeholders will play heavily in the “acquisition and final use of the war machine developed” (2004, p 25-26).
PMBOK Guide claims the “key stakeholders on every project include:
• Project Manager
• Customer/ End-users
• Performing organization
• Project team members
• Project Management team
• Sponsors
• Influencers
• PMO (2004, p 25-26)
The initial response to the question: “Who are the project stakeholders, bearing in mind the DOD is the end user stakeholder,” is in a stakeholder analysis. During the Scope definition as discussed in PMBOK Guide chapter 5, it is important to “identify influence and interests of the various stakeholders and document their needs, wants and expectations” (2004, p 110).
As all analysis is quantitative, “the analysis diligently selects, prioritizes, and quantifies” those conditions. The Guide also states there is “high risk in quantifying expectations” that are non-specific, such as “customer satisfaction” (paraphrased, (2004, p 110).
The scope places high priority on the identification of the stakeholders. As part of our exercise the stakeholders can be declared in the statements of the scope risk management phase. Certain assumptions in the scope risk management have to be proven if found false, especially if the assumptions are part of the stakeholders’ claims. The same can be said for scope boundaries, and “scope priority requirements risk management” (2004, p111).
According to PMBOK Guide: Quality risk management also is paramount to end-users’ enduring stability. The various quality standards for industry apply as reference to a quality expectation. Improper inspections, lack of maintenance, or rushing through a task can produce negative consequences for “any and all of the project stakeholders” This is an understatement when the negative turns out to be a plane crash due to “defects, poorly organized user documentation or numerous extraneous features” (2004, p 180).
Some Quality Standards Organizations in context are:

• International Organization for Standardization, ISO
• Total Quality Management, TQM
• Six Sigma
• Failure Mode and Effect Analysis
• Design reviews
• Voice of the Customer
• Cost of Quality, COQ
• Continuous Improvement
• Communications Planning
• Performance Reporting
• Risk Management
(2004, p 180)

Conclusion: Who are they?
1) The Project Manager is the elected liaison from the ranks, placed by the stakeholders
2) The Customer end-user is the US citizenry as represented in the Department of Defense:
a. The class of military personnel due to use and maintain the end product
b. B2G, business to Government, B2B, and B2C; all lien-holders and bond holders
3) The Performing Organization, or PMO, is the labor groups who are affected by the completion or non-completion of the project. This could be a large group in this case.
4) The Team Members are the “dozen nuclear scientists, engineers, and technology professionals including military personnel” and all their distaff members
5) The Project management Team is my esteemed colleagues
6) The Sponsor is the US government Department of Defense, DOD
7) The Influencers will have been identified as stakeholders in each of the risk management knowledge phases such as:
8) Members of Committee in Legislatures, the Judicial, or the Executive
a. Security Organizations
b. Environmental organizations
c. Lobbyists
d. Risk Management Organizations
The list includes but is not limited to the above. It is abridged for this discussion, though it will include in the end many watch groups, accounting branches and other business groups local, nationally and internationally.
Reference:
CTUOnline (November 2006) Task Detail, MPM450 03 0604B Managing Project Risk and Opportunities
Pmi org (2006) retrieved from web, Nov 15 2006 Project Management Institute (PMI) The Largest Project Management Association. Retrieved October 19, 2006, from pmi org info default asp
PMBOK; (2004) A Guide to the Project Management Body of Knowledge, PMBOK Guide, third edition, 2004 project management Institute, 4 Campus Blvd, Newton Square, PA 19073 USA