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Thursday, January 08, 2009

Part One The Another Rock Operaepic: Helicopters, Gunships and Tanks


PART ONE



A Rock Operaepic ... [using the Yiddish Dictionary Online]
by Pat Darnell

-- Act One -- Scene One
[Jolly Old Hamas Boys singing and lobbing missiles and mortars into Israel during Hanukah from the Gaza Strip]

Lob a missile, no one will notice
Lob another, on Israel's hagode'spice
Hamas says "Aim it at Jew pop'lace
like barrels of fish loafs'es gefilteh ..."

We Hamas bully you at khosedl
and invite you to the prom
Here's another aerial bomb
for your gay dreydl and opshtel

Nothing personal, Ehud Barak,
but your infidel protector ally
is soon run by o'bama Barack
with his house slave slice Hillar'ally...

Hama think you unwieldy
Here eat this knuckle shnitke
Another cease fire missile on you Israeli
Quick... quick, take a picture Al Jazeeree!

[Flashes of blinding bright lights going off all over, with poparattzi figures all around in top hats with cards in them that say PRESS... and CNN, MSNBC, FOX, AJ, G4]
______________________________
-- Scene Two --

[Chris the Swedish Narrator from a country so well known for its military prowess in all the years of world war, Sweden]
Swedish Accented Gay Man's Voice Over Speaking English: "Israel has just lost its right to exist! If you first steal a country, then kill and expel their rightful citizens just to follow them and kill them in their refugee camps outside your stolen country - then - you've passed all humanitarian lines and wherefore lost your own right to even exist. Sorry to say, but Israel must be terminated for the sake of all humans right to international peace."
-- fade off --
[Israeli ground troops take up arms, and sing, and march to a tune of old origins. Helicopters, gunships and tanks are rolling and flying into the night...]
Kibutzim to the left
Kibutzim to the right
this is not a soccer match
its a regular army fight

You sakone lobbed 6000 missiles
in 1000 days -- day and night
you Hamas' flatulence
its December twenty eight
It's time to come to
mamehloosh'n Israel's defense

To Kamran, Maradona, and Xenia
and Taher al-Noono
"I invite you and especially your families
spend some days in the Israel arena
where by a few rockets every day
we are attacked for years, yorn la'nga
you devil lickin' Hamas hyenas

Surely your Fatah's will now rejoice
as we pound your Hamas into matsah toast
while US and Brits sing in one voice
"Your Hamas-run interior ministry
of Gaza Strip, well, they are toyt'z."

Oh yeah... weeoooweeooo
Mousa Abu Morzouz,
deputy leader of Hamas people
What did you tell Al Jazeera?
Something about your lost knipl?

Oh yeah... weeoooweeooo
Kibutzim to the left
Kibutzim to the right
Ehud Barak says tonight,
"Any Hamas target is a target"
"Kick 'em hard in the buttockz..."
"Boot 'em thusly in their tookhes..."
"Sweden boy, know this, you are a putz...."
[End of Scene Two]
_________________________________
I have to stop here; this is exhausting.... pd/ Act Two tomorrow... maybe.

4 comments:

Pribek said...

great! great idea! usually I can tell how these things are going to suss out but here, you've got me on the edge of my seat waiting-

Who gets the girl?

MooPig said...

And that is why we tune in to Pribek.net; we haven't even thought about the girl... hmmmm.

We will get back to you. BTW, do you have any extra Inauguration Tickets?

Pribek said...

sorry, no extras-I have been invited to the view the action from the Harry Truman Memorial luxury box (catered by Morty's Delicatessen!) and those suckers don't exactly grow on trees.

MooPig said...

Is it a gig for you there in the sky box, Mr Pribek... ?

That is a very impressive invite for you... we all agree..

Could you stuff a few cold cuts in the gig bags on the way out... for us all later?

Have a great time.

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