Here is how D2R2 sees it; out of total confusion comes a master's responses...
"Well, I'm crazy for contests and I see that Jack is Back...Yea!...and Vinnie went to the library...Yea! Here goes."
1. ...and when the lions finished, two vultures scooped up the leavings, tried to board a plane for Borneo and the flight attendant said "Sorry but no carrion allowed." (L)
2. ...but seriously who would hire me? (C)
3. Standing below the piano dropped out of the window...that's fear. (E)
4. Now, if you'll just lift me out of this pot. (P)
5. ...but then there was this bright light and the next thing I knew I awoke strapped to a table. (O)
6. ...or is it more like mirrored Ray Bans? (B)
7. You know, the old "mortar round to the eye" shot. (Q)
8. Speaking of lonely aliens, is the Democratic party the anti-Christ? (W)
9. I will stare at the roses and change them to real, just as I will change myself back into David Bowie. (F)
10. pinko Commies (S)
11. I, however, am presenting Airanus today. (M)
12. If you don't believe me read it backwards standing on one leg.
13.To prove it I'd like to present this model of Bruce Willis. (D)
14. Sometimes the work comes to me. (i)
15. (T)(T)&(A)
16. Cross my heart and hope to die.(A)
17. (K)
18. (O)
19. Or as we say in the wolf pack, "I'm rolling over here, how about a belly rub?"
20. Cross my heart and hope to die. (A) *[that makes a double cross ... I get it]*
21. Not only different, nearly supernatural. They should all have super hero names. (X)
22. Jeez Louise. I don't know. I never thought about it like that. If they do, it must mean tea is bad for you and coffee is good for you. What about sodas? (J)
Match a Caption with a Picture :: or Not -- Maybe you just want to look at the Pictures and read the Quips -- thas' aight!
by your Friend Pat Darnell and Google Images
1) Two lions broke loose in the zoo and were eating a clown.
One lion said to the other ...
"Does this taste funny to you?" - Anon.
2) I'm a classic example of all humorists — only funny when I'm working. - Peter Sellers
3) One has fear in front of a goat, in back of a mule, and on every side of a fool --Edgar Watson Howe
4)"It is the pervading law of all things organic, and inorganic, of all things physical and metaphysical, of all things human and all things super-human, of all true manifestations of the head, of the heart, of the soul, that the life is recognizable in its expression, that form ever follows function. This is the law." Louis Sullivan
5) When I was an itty bitty baby ... my mammy 'uold rock me in the cradle ... in 'dem ole' cotton fields back home ...
6) "Poetry can bridge that gap between what is solid and what is suggested; poetry can pull cogent meaning from the vaporous illusions of the esoteric." Bryant H. Mc Gill
7)"If aliens from outer space ever come and we show them our civilization and they make fun of it, we should say we were just kidding, that this isn't really our civilization, but a gag we hoped they would like. Then we tell them to come back in twenty years to see our REAL civilization. After that, we start a crash program of coming up with an impressive new civilization. Either that, or just shoot down the aliens as they're waving good-bye." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
8) "I gave up on new poetry myself thirty years ago, when most of it began to read like coded messages passing between lonely aliens on a hostile world." »Russell Baker
9) Samuel Butler’s image for inutility ... in his novel "The Way of All Flesh"-the bee that has strayed into a drawing room and is buzzing against the wallpaper, trying to extract nectar from one of the painted roses.
10) "Who let the dogs out?"
11) JetBlast talking shop... "you're actually comparing poo to pee, there's no truely modeled airbus available right now, your only hope is the vaporous guys airsimmer and airlinerxp."
12) "Our constitution protects aliens, drunks and U.S. Senators." »Will Rogers
13) “I don’t really know anything about art, but I know what I like!”
This noble phrase, for many of us, has been a call to adventure to the alluring world of art.
My friend, the art historian, Peter Weller likes to quote a very famous art scholar, E. H. Gombrich who in reference to this rather innocent phrase says, “You know what you like and you like what you know.”
14) Every morning I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work. »Robert Orben
15) Most people would like to be 
delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.16) If you can laugh together, you can work together. »Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian. »Orben, ibid.
17) I’m struggling with this so I am really interested in what you think. Does knowing more about an artist, a painting, a musical composition, a building, or a style increase your enjoyment of the work? In my case, I have found this invariably to be true. One great thinker told me I was addicted to the gratification of knowledge. Guilty as charged.
18) “Easy for you to say!” I wanted to scream. “Some of us need a little
help over here with this stuff!”
19) The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting. (Sun Tzu, 400-430 bc Chinese Military Strategist)
20) The dialectic at work. Create violence through economic pressures, the media, mind control, agent provocateurs - thesis. Counter it with totalitarian measures, more mind control, police crackdowns, surveillance, drugging of the population - antithesis. What ensues is Orwell’s vision of 1984, a society of total control - synthesis. (Mind Control, World Control by Jim Keith)
21) On the other hand, you have different fingers. --Steven Wright
22) Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? --Steven Wright
1 comment:
Well, I'm crazy for contests and I see that Jack is Back...Yea!...and Vinnie went to the library...Yea! Here goes.
1. ...and when the lions finished, two vultures scooped up the leavings, tried to board a plane for Borneo and the flight attendant said "Sorry but no carrion allowed." (L)
2. ...but seriously who would hire me? (C)
3. Standing below the piano dropped out of the window...that's fear. (E)
4. Now, if you'll just lift me out of this pot. (P)
5. ...but then there was this bright light and the next thing I knew I awoke strapped to a table. (O)
6. ...or is it more like mirrored Ray Bans? (B)
7. You know, the old "mortar round to the eye" shot. (Q)
8. Speaking of lonely aliens, is the Democratic party the anti-Christ? (W)
9. I will stare at the roses and change them to real, just as I will change myself back into David Bowie. (F)
10. pinko Commies (S)
11. I, however, am presenting Airanus today. (M)
12. If you don't believe me read it backwards standing on one leg.
13.To prove it I'd like to present this model of Bruce Willis. (D)
14. Sometimes the work comes to me. (i)
15. (T)(T)&(A)
16. Cross my heart and hope to die.
(A)
17. (K)
18. (O)
19. Or as we say in the wolf pack, "I'm rolling over here, how about a belly rub?"
20. Cross my heart and hope to die. (A)
21. Not only different, nearly supernatural. They should all have super hero names. (X)
22. Jeez Louise. I don't know. I never thought about it like that. If they do, it must mean tea is bad for you and coffee is good for you. What about sodas? (J)
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