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Saturday, October 10, 2009

MooPig MMA Reviews: Brock Lesnar and Brands

by Pat Darnell and Cage Potatos Everywhere, with Google Images

I was conceived in the backseat
cup holder of an S.U.V. [Es Yoo Vee]
Going up US Interstate Highway ...
... one hundred and forty-three
Lord I was born an armchair man
Lord I was born an armchair athlete ...
Trying to escape a living
Doin' the best I can in retreat ....
When it's time for leavin'
I hope you understand
I eat peaches and then I eat the can.

Yes, we enter the age of armchair sports. If I got in a ring\octagon cage with any of the people purported to be Mixed Martial Arts masters today, male or female fighter .... we may all shudder about the outcome. I have a glass jaw as it is.

At two hundred sixty-five pounds, Brock Lesnar has won the Heavy Weight Title in MMA Ultimate Fighting Championship. Sometimes the announcers have a little insider information, like a fighter is fighting tonight to buy his wife a new house if he wins. No glory in just walking to your possible death, he or she is fighting for the glory and sanctity of a sound marriage; who would dare contest their bond? Brock was fighting for his bride that night.

In professional wrestling, comic books came to life. Acrobats made a cause out of Insanity. Insane Clowns Posse exemplify our pro wrestling national augmentality. Edge of suburbia, white flight city dwellers desire and cherish blood sport. The sport of blood has developed NERO-ian dirty boxing face of chain link and Jack's Links. Barefoot and bare knuckled, almost Coloseum gigantic due to TV audience, and wearing garb from their Dojo's, MMA participants are amazing athletes.

Brock Lesnar started in the pro wrestling arena tossing around Hulk Hogan. He has now conquered and captured the image of UFC MMA. See the pro wrestler tiny togs, Speedo tighties, that come with pounding Hogan into canvas in pro wrestling on Brock?
Observe now the punkie baggies of the MMA Octagon. Brock had a change of costume from then to now. I have a theory. Brock made a decision about sponsorships. It seems that one must bear the billboard of sponsors to enter the Octagon.

I think, Joe Rogan might have been the crusader of this phenom, as the mouth of blood sport. But nevertheless, right there on the Brock's thigh is Jack's Links Brand. These little bits of beef jerky were demo'd throughout Wal-mart-dom about the time Brock went to war with Randy Coutre, former heavy weight champ MMA. Beautiful people got a free cup of tasty Jack Links beef and got to watch Brock hammer fist Coutre into the mat. And while that Aryan fist beat his elder's face -- we all could see that Jack Links made him do it ... it's printed on his shorts.


CupHolderGuy said...


I came across your site from a Google alert for "cup holder". Since my product's blog is related to this, and because Google is fond of content related links, I was hoping you'd be interested in a blogroll link exchange. This is where I link to your site, and you link to mine.

For examples of this (under the "Blogroll" category on the right side of my blog), for more information on my product/blog, or to contact me, please visit .

Thanks in advance for your consideration.


MooPig_Wisdom said...

Hi Jeff of CupHolderguy Handle:
This article has the word "cupholder" in it, yes; and I suspect you found us through that. That amuses us to no end. After one of us takes a look at your site we will put it in our blog lists in our sidebar. Sorry, though we rarely advertise.

This blog is about good news, old news, fiction -- designed for helping writers with wakeup. We are writers' writers bent on helping others to "get started."

Consider it like a magazine in a waiting room at the Dentist office. Imagine reading an article, and thinking wow, I didn't know that. That bit of reading gets a writer's juices flowing. No? Yes that is an ambitious claim for anyone.

Most of its posts have a swerve in them, inspired by Bill Gaines of MAD Magazine flavored parody, humor, and facts. We seek out links to gifted writers, writers who tell the truth, but never let truth get in the way of a good story.

Although truth is an elusive virtue, MooPig gains knowledge from its patient friends. Click on some of the links in the sidebar to visit some exquisite sites. I suggest Pribek, Atlas Shrugged, Kabobfest, PC MAG ... all to the right.

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Thanks for stopping by, may the Phelps be with you:
Pat Darnell and Friends

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