MooPig :poop: Department :: "Pet Lovers' Derivatives"

[Picture LINK] "..."You often have to carry a bag of hot poop for many long minutes while running into every attractive opposite-sex acquaintance you have."..."

"Scruffy has to go outside, Junior..."
Martial Mashed Article by Pat Darnell  |  Mar 17, 2015  |  Bryan TX

Test for whether one is a bonafide writer or not ... "How many times do you have to look up the difference between 'affect' and 'effect?'"

There are two kinds of people, those who let their pets poop all over, and those who let their pets poop all over but never mention it. I have been both kinds. Unfortunately, our pets' pooping all over affects our long-standing watersheds. See article below.

Are Americans ready to 'effect' martial law on pets pooping all over? Ha! *[Let's see if I did that correctly]*  LINK -- I still can't figure it out.

As a young person I let our Pekingese-Cocker-Spaniel, Baby, poop all over the back yard and just avoided it as I mowed the yard. As a young adult I let our Border Collie poop all over his dog run. I couldn't organize my own wastage's, how could I affectingly manage our pup's waste?

Now after several scat sorties by this blog, I find I am still dilettante, and never will get it through my thick skull that the pets are pooping all over the place. Unfortunately, I have genetically passed on this shortsightedness to my children.

No Poop Fairy, so manage your pets' waste - National Green Living | Examiner.com: "The most effective way for pet owners to limit their pet’s contribution to source water contamination is to simply clean up and dispose of pet waste. As long as the droppings are not mixed with other materials, pet waste should be flushed down the toilet."

"...[I]n Northern Virginia, a dog population of 11,400 is estimated to contribute about 5,000 pounds of solid waste every day and has been identified as a major contributor of bacteria to the stream. Nearly 500 fecal coliform samples have been taken from Four Mile Run and its tributaries since 1990, and about 50 percent of these samples have exceeded the Virginia State water quality standard for fecal coliform bacteria, according to EPA..."

CONCLUSION
Food in; poop out.

____________________Reference
http://grammar.yourdictionary.com/style-and-usage/affect-effect-grammar.html
http://www.examiner.com/article/no-poop-fairy-so-manage-your-pets-waste
http://www.dogster.com/lifestyle/dog-walking-picking-up-poop-bags

MooPig Report from the Middle :: "A Million LIKES equals one New Puppy"

[Picture LINK] Trolling for more "pageviews?"

We Didn't Think :: It was Possible
Mixed Mashed Articles by Pat Darnell  |  Nov 1, 2014  |  Bryan TX

"We didn't think" is the first half of this comparison, while "It was possible" is the other half of our output. In summary, MooPig Wisdom is a compendium with 3290 self-published articles since 2006. Most articles spin stories already breaching people's minds by mish-mashing published articles from many secondary sources. Journalism has been put on notice, so to speak.

"We didn't think" our musings would interest anyone in the short term, nor in the long term. We did it to write about interesting developments that might inspire our six children. But they read maybe one tenth of one percent of the posts. So we failed to reach our children. However "it was possible" to attract over a million outside readers in eight years.

How do we know that? With Google's help we charted 1,155,609 pageviews over that period of time. That excludes our own viewing of the pages, and we know we have only single digit numbers of followers. We are just one out of thousands of blogs, if you can call us that, that uses content from other sources. We exist to re-direct while making some foolhardy conclusions from "what we have read." Eh?

Three things help in attracting pageviews, or LIKE's: 1-we don't advertise anything thus our page loads fast, 2-we lay claim to high ideals in our posts, 3-pirated pictures of women's bosoms attracts the most pageviews per article no matter what the content is in those posts. [Note: our number four largest attraction of pageviews is this one.. showing Erika Eleniak's ample bosom.]

Other blogs can produce 20,000 pageviews per day ... one of our favorite is Pribek. So their totals are several millions for an eight year existence. Pribek focuses on music in his blog, and specifically on electric guitar music performances, business, and related anecdotes.

So, you see, dear reader, the numbers are quantifiable, and pertain to content. Content will bring you out of your anonymity to a greater place -- one million pageviews! MooPig Wisdom will always "try" to stick to its goal of promoting "Voice, Content, and Style" in all its industry.

How to get those million views in the shortest amount of time? Here is an article that puts that figure to test:

The following article asks: "...Where’s the authenticity? Or, putting it another way, where are the corporate equivalents of a puppy post?"

How long does it take to get one million likes on Facebook? My guess is 8 hours. - Anthill Online:

'via Blog this'

"...What can we learn from this? That heartfelt, ‘grass-roots’ content wins. This is a natural, emotive and real piece of content.

"...Social Object Theory, in relation to social media, means that there must be something to have a conversation about. Simply creating a brand page on Facebook and filling it with inane or pithy content, is not a social media strategy..."

CONCLUSION
It might interest you that in Google Chrome you can go to New Incognito Window to surf the net. It is in the settings on your menu bar that you use to customize and control Google Chrome.

______________________Reference
http://anthillonline.com/how-long-does-it-take-to-get-one-million-likes-on-facebook-my-guess-is-8-hours/
http://pribek.net/
http://rap.genius.com/Rakim-flow-forever-lyrics#note-1533651
http://alfalfalfa.com/archives/6755318.html
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2010/06/best-poop-blog-post-of-2010-nominations.html

MooPig :poop: Department :: "Earth as a Toilet"

Most Will Shy Away from this Discussion
Mashed Martial Articles by Pat Darnell  |  June 28, 2014  |  Bryan TX

"What is shocking in India is this picture [HERE] of someone practicing open defecation and in the other hand having a mobile phone," said Maria Neira, director of Public Health at the WHO.

We can only imagine what an Indian wedding is like. The dogged truth is that bears do shit in the woods. When you are surrounded by a world of shit, there is still wonderful things all around to look at -- or is there ...?

"... Paris lovers try not to notice the dog poop everywhere, but they have to be careful anyway. In my neighborhood, if you don't have your eyes riveted on the sidewalk as you walk, you will have a nasty surprise on your shoes when you get home. Hundreds of people a year wind up in the hospital after slipping in the dog poop ( LINK) ..."

And then, there are 14 places you can aspire to pee/poop, including the ISS, ski slopes, underwater, and others, according to this article:

"...13. The Ski-Jump Toilet
Japan’s Madarao-Kogen hotel is home to the simulated ski-jump toilet, offering maximum comfort without the harshness of winter: “The cubicles were fully wrapped on all sides, so that the person caught short would have a ski jumper’s view when they were sitting on the loo.” (LINK)..."

[Picture LINK]

This bit started with this article:

One Billion People Still Practise Open Defecation, Endangering Public Health: UN: "Tom Miles GENEVA, May 8 (Reuters) - One billion people worldwide still practise "open defecation" and they need to be told that this leads to the spread of fatal diseases, U.N. experts said on Thursday at the launch of a study on drinking water and sanitation. "'Excreta', 'faeces', 'poo', I could even say 'shit' maybe, this is the root cause of so many diseases," said Bruce Gordon, acting coordinator for sanitation and health at the World Health Organization."
'via Blog this

"... Many countries have made great progress in tackling open defecation, with Vietnam and Bangladesh - where more than one in three people relieved themselves in the open in 1990 - virtually stamping out the practice entirely by 2012."

"...India's government has now woken up to the need to change attitudes, he said, with a "Take the poo to the loo" campaign that aims to make open defecation unacceptable, helped by a catchy YouTube video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_peUxE_BKcU  ."


CONCLUSION
Depend on MooPig to keep you informed. We will be monitoring all forms of excrement through out the world, and maybe make some charts up, and possibly mash a bunch of articles together to help you in your scatological pursuits. Remember -- we at MooPig will always be better than FOX News! Don't want to set the barre too high now.

EPILOGUE
Things we still want to know:

1. Has Bill Gates entered the stage where he locks himself in a Hotel room and doesn't bathe?
2. What became of the Westboro Baptist Church media whores?
3. Does Jose still work for Kennedy Underground Utilities Company? His job was to find water, no matter where he was.
4. If I put Erika Eleniak's picture on this post, will it become a number one in page-views post?
5. Why do networks pixel-ate out sponsors on UFC fighters' shorts and shirts when they show reruns of their fights?
6. Why does my foot shake when I type? Is that restless leg syndrome? I am, after all, almost 60. 

Erika Eleniak in "Under Siege"

________________Reference
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/08/one-billion-open-defecation_n_5289049.html
http://www.ruerude.com/2011/10/paris-dog-shit-poop-capital-of-the-world.html
http://knoxwulf.wordpress.com/2013/03/25/cell-phone-conspiracy/
http://youtu.be/_peUxE_BKcU
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2010/04/science-of-flatulence-farts-oops-poops.html
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2010/06/best-poop-blog-post-of-2010-nominations.html
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2012/02/todays-non-syndicated-funnies.html
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2012/10/moopig-archaeology-nano-second-ancient.html
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2013/02/letters-department-bill-gates-2013.html
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2013/08/moopigs-medical-diagnostics-and-health.html

MooPig Report from the Middle :: "The Almost Dog"

Robert David Darnell
by Pat Darnell  |  Dec 27, 2013  |  Bryan TX

[Picture by Desiree Darnell] Christmas Day, Dad with our dog Foos, "Where's the new puppy, Grandpaw?"

It has been cool this month. That is how we describe the weather when it is 70 highs and 45 lows, in Houston.

"I don't think we are going to get any freeze this year," says Robert Darnell, my 91 year old Dad.

Since Mom passed away last April, Dad is alone much of the day. He has a home health care helper, Treena, come in from 1 PM to 6 PM every day to help him in his routine. We dropped in on him for Christmas Day. Dropped in as in brought the kids, the dog, and lots of food. Dad eats like a bird.
[Picture LINK]

He said he lost 20 pounds since his last year's physical, now weighing in at 145. He goes to the VA Hospital on 2002 Holcombe Blvd, Houston, in the Michael DeBakey VA Medical Center. Dad wears hearing aids in both ears since his hearing faltered. It was determined he lost much of his hearing ability during WWII when he was on a Destroyer in the Pacific. "Our guns pounding the Japanese during Okinawa, pop, pop, when Kamikazers were trying to sink us ..." Dad says.

Two days before Christmas Dad's home health helper drove him down to Pet Rescue. He thought he might try a small dog to keep him company. So he and Treena mulled over the group of pups in the shelter, and settled on a terrier. Another family thought they might like this pup too. But Dad did the paper work, and adoption process and took his new puppy home.

Treena and Dad showed her the back yard where she would do her business. They played with her in the house.

For the rest of the day the puppy sat calmly in his lap, and followed Dad around the house. Dad uses a rolling walker to get around. He has had a bum knee since he wrenched it a few years back. The VA told him it would take a knee replacement to fix it. But he decided after watching Mom go through that, that he would forego that surgery, "because he is too ole," and has settled for monthly shots that ease his knee.

"What kind of dog is she?" I asked Dad on the phone when I called to tell him we would be there
Christmas Day.

"She's a mixture Terrier," said Dad.

Everything went okay, Treena left for the day, leaving Dad with his new Pup. Around dusk the puppy followed her instincts, and got very riled and boisterous as she heard someone walking outside in the street. Dad puttered over to the front door and opened it. His new puppy tore out of the house and got on the heels of one of Dad's neighbors. It was a nightmare for Dad, because of his impaired hearing, and he has to go pretty slow with his walker on the uneven ground outside.

Dad had to go all the way out to in the street and try to get the puppy back in the house. With his neighbor's help some how they meticulously got the puppy to calm down and go back in Dad's house.

Dad continued his evening routine and eventually went to bed.

When he woke up he discovered several piles of doggy doo around the house. Things were looking bad for Dad's new companion. Dad of course, can't stoop like he used to, and he can't clean like he used to. So, when Treena returned in the afternoon, they took the puppy back to the shelter for the other family who also wanted her.

That's our Report from the Middle; where the women are strong, the men are good-looking, and the children are all above average.

________________________Reference
http://www.houston.va.gov/

MooPig Doggie go Woof Woof :: "Modern Dog"

Retrieved by Pat Darnell and K9 | Jan 3, 2013 | Bryan TX

[Picture "Foos" at the Darnell's]

13 Most Prevalent Dog Illnesses ::  How to Prevent Them - PawNation: "Over 150 years ago, the first case of E.P.I., exocrine pancreatic insufficiency, was discovered in dogs. While it isn't extremely common, the occurrence of this illness has increased in recent years. According to the College of Veterinary Medicine at Texas A/M University, nearly 8,000 dogs in the United States are diagnosed with E.P.I. and this number is expected to rise."

'via Blog this'

UPDATE:

Francesca Cangialosi
What is it about small dogs that get to us? One its like have an eternal puppy. I watch my almost three year old Rocky run around the house like a little mad man. He challenges Logan to not be an old fuddy duddy and brings out the puppy in the even older Charly. Watching Charly and Rocky play some times is like watching two puppies run around the yard, frollicking for the pure joy of frollicking. Rocky gets Logan to play with a toy..sometimes throwing it back and forth while chasing each other down the hall. I love watching these three furballs interact with one another. Its like watching siblings play...and yes, they do even argue like siblings especially when one wants to sleep and the other wants to play or if Logan just wants to walk down the hall to go outside and Rocky thinks he needs to challenge him every step of the way.
Yes I love my furball babies. When they went to get groomed, it was just Charly and I in the house. The house was so unusually quiet and I think we both felt a little lost without those two furbabies. Interesting how my little pack and I depend on each other and interact with one another. We are a family. (Francesca Cangialosi. facebook. Jan 3, 2013. near Albuquerque, NM)... "

TAGS: More on PawNation: Arthritis, Cancer, Dogs, Fleas and Ticks, Giardia, Health, Mange, Newborns, Obesity, Puppies, Rabies, Sad, Safety

_________________________Reference
http://www.pawnation.com/2012/12/28/13-most-prevalent-dog-illnesses-and-how-to-prevent-them/?ncid=webmail29

Catholic Case for Leash Laws

Can one Identify a DogWood by its Bark?
Retrieved by PDnF