Sunday Funnies

Collected MEMES, Pace Yourself
Jacked by Pat Darnell  |  Nov 30, 2013  |  Bryan TX

Systems Normal, All Fowled UP

MooPig 'Stuff No One Wants to Hear About' Department :: "Sumangali Workers"

In India the Untouchables are not the Thugs nor the G-Men
Retrieved by Pat Darnell  |  Nov. 29, 2013  |  Bryan TX

[Picture LINK]

“We are hopeful that these suggestions by the advocates are helpful to us to get us back the money from the company which failed to pay even after the stipulated period,” said Mupidathi, an 18 year old girl who was cheated of nearly `50,000 after working for a period of 3 years in a cotton mill in Tirupattur.

EXCERPT  | " ... These girls work in a camp based setting where they are not allowed to go anywhere. They are made to work for more than 12 hours a day; some are sexually harassed, not paid even after end of the agreement. Almost 90 per cent of the workers employed in these industries are bonded laborers under Apprentice act. Legally we have not been able to do much things as the industries have strong political connections,” said Joseph Victor Raj, State Convener, CACL – TN and PY.

To address this issue legally and ensure protection of female children, many advocates from Chennai High court were invited to present their suggestions and ideas that could prevent such exploitation in future. (©2013 The New Indian Express. November 23, 2013 in Chennai. LINK) ... "

I Tried to See Where My T-Shirt Was Made, and the Factory Sent Thugs After Me | Mother Jones: "Indeed, some Western companies have taken measures to discourage their suppliers from using sumangali labor. Levi Strauss and Co. provides financial support to SAVE, while Gap helped establish the Tirupur Stakeholders Forum, which sets detailed ethical guidelines for factories. More than 80 companies, including Gap, H and M, and Walmart, have joined an industry group called the Ethical Trading Initiative, ETI, which works with NGOs, Non-governmental Organizations, to educate workers about recruiting schemes and is trying to reduce the sumangali contract terms from three years to six months. But Peter McAllister, the director of ETI, would not speak specifically about any of the Indian companies whose factories I investigated, nor their Western buyers, because the group is concerned about the delicate relationship it has with the companies." (DANA LIEBELSON. Mother Jones. Nov. 29, 2013. LINK)

'via Blog this'

If you, dear reader, are looking for a time and place of origin for this batch of acronyms, we could offer this: "... The Department for International Development, DFID, is a United Kingdom government department with a Cabinet Minister in charge. It was separated from the Foreign and Commonwealth Office in 1997. The goal of the department is "to promote sustainable development and eliminate world poverty (y ikki peed ya. LINK) ... "

In 2007 this report was made:

CONCLUSION
Somehow the story about indentured slavery of sumangali girls is getting out, but shameless fabric mills just get better at hiding their "internationally" illegal labor practices. As is the case for so many Transnational Manufacturing schemes, different stages of the fabric process are compartmentalized. "Just how bad is it?"... no one seems to be on top of this flesh empire who will speak about it. If you try to talk in person with would be spokespersons about the status of workers in fabric industries, you are shunned and threatened. It is quite difficult to find one whistle-blower in the whole supply chain of fabric manufacturing.

______________________Reference
http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2013/11/india-garment-factories-sumangali?page=2
http://m.newindianexpress.com/chennai/72564
http://www.motherjones.com/environment/2012/03/walmart-china-sweatshops-t-shirt
http://www.motherjones.com/photoessays/2011/08/jeans-sandblast-bangladesh/01
http://www.motherjones.com/environment/2012/03/walmart-china-sweatshops-t-shirt
http://www.motherjones.com/environment/2012/08/skinny-jeans-environmental-impact
http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2008/11/o-say-can-you-buy
http://www.ethicaltrade.org/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethical_Trading_Initiative
http://www1.umn.edu/humanrts/links/eticode.html
http://www.ethicaltrade.org/sites/default/files/resources/BASECODE%20POSTER%20ENG%20India%20WEB.pdf
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Department_for_International_Development
http://inef.uni-due.de/page/documents/Report91.pdf

MooPig Trend Spotter Department :: "Black Friday"

Black Friday only gets Darker
Jacked articles by Pat Darnell  |  Nov 29, 2013  |  Bryan TX

[Pictured LINK] Pope blesses crowd at Wal-Mart, Vatican City Location, at dawn today after being hoisted up on shoulders of eager store patrons.

Black Friday Horror Stories - Business Insider: "4. Grandmas started dueling over a RadioShack calculator.  "One of the sale items was a $10 calculator marked down to $5. Two sweet, elderly women came in to the store looking for them. When I told them there was only one left in the display, it was on," writes Jsquaw.

"The one grandma who lost the race called the other one horrible names as she was standing in the checkout line, gripping her $5 prize.""

'via Blog this'

We live in a college town. Bryan TX is sister city with College Station TX where Texas A and M is located. There are other colleges around here too, like Blinn, and A and M Consolidated... etc.

I was talking just now with my youngest son, 17, about the news that a Wal-Mart employee was trampled when doors opened at 6AM this morning. This happened in Delaware, or, as reported HERE. I mentioned to my son that we live in a place, Bryan, where that sort of thing won't happen for many years. He said, "I bet there is a death here next year [Black Friday, 2014]."

I chuckled, but then started thinking about it, and thus this post is written. Black Friday is enigmatic, and now dangerous. On most Wal-Mart walls, written in Sharpie on poster board, taped to the blue bricks, is the sign "BLITZ starts HERE" with arrow pointing to entrance.

I then explained to youngest son, "Do you know where the word Blitz comes from?" His eyes glazed over as he prepared himself for one of my miserable anecdotes.

"No, Dad," he replied.

So I gave the talk about how Nazi Germany developed a method of warfare called the Blitzkrieg, and that this word has been co-opt'd to the abbreviation "Blitz" which American football has made it a term describing a type of defensive-turned-offensive maneuver ... and now Wal-Mart uses the word for its Black Friday rush by mobs of shoppers at its stores in early hours on Black Friday.

This hour I found this LINK in my gmail, from ChristianBook.com, along with 66 updates concerning Black Friday Week Deals and sales online. In Christian circles I always thought Black Friday was the day remembered for when Christ was crucified.

CONCLUSION
Why would anyone go to a dangerous Blitz opening at a store, when one could stay at his laptop and shop all the same stuff Online?

MORAL OF THIS STORY
A good Defense is having a good Offense. Or, good news is free advertising: bad news is free advertising.

____________________Reference
http://www.businessinsider.com/black-friday-horror-stories-2013-11
http://www.vice.com/en_ca/read/walmart-still-hasnt-paid-its-fine-from-the-2008-black-friday-trampling-death
http://gizmodo.com/5099819/walmart-worker-trampled-to-death-by-deal+crazed-black-friday-shoppers
http://gizmodo.com/5098946/10-reasons-were-doomed-black-friday-edition

[German : Blitz, lightning (from Middle High German blitze, from bliczen, to flash, from Old High German blekkazzen; seebhel-1 in Indo-European roots) + Krieg, war (from Middle High German kriec, from Old High German krg, stubbornness; see gwer-1 in Indo-European roots).]

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

http://www.christianbook.com/page/promotion/black-friday-deals/1382452780?event=Ecast
http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1re0rl/retail_employees_of_reddit_what_are_your_black/
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/pope-idol-but-francis-i-knows-the-real-battles-are-yet-to-come-8952437.html

Happy Thanksgiving !!!!!!!!!!!

To MooPigsters Everywhere -- Grace and Blessings on this Day
Scooped by Pat Darnell | Nov 28, 2013 | Bryan TX

[Picture Source Unknown]

MooPig e-Cigarette Department :: "Quitting Smoking?"

VapeGeek has your Vaper's Style in Stock
mashed articles by Pat Darnell  |  Nov 28, 2013  |  Bryan TX

[Logo LINK]

War within the EU: European Commission acting against European Parliament’s will on e-cigarettes: "      ...      It is obvious that the Commission’s proposal contradicts almost every aspect of the amendment voted by the Parliament. This should be considered a scandal, shows disrespect towards the will of the MEPs and is an effort to bypass all procedures and implement a strange agenda of illegalizing e-cigarettes. For example, they ask that e-cigarettes should be free from contaminants while they know that this cannot happen and they know that even pharmaceutical NRTs have nitrosamines (at levels similar to e-cigarettes). In any case, they have completely ignored science showing that nicotine is needed for e-cigarettes to be effective, users self-titrate their nicotine intake and any instructions on dosage are useless, and flavors are an important part in consumers’ efforts to reduce or quit smoking. "

'via Blog this'

Dually Drivers, and Hockey Moms everywhere vape, so should you, if you want to quit smoking cancer sticks:

1. Variability of devices and flavors play a major role in vapers’ efforts to reduce or quit smoking
2. Nicotine is an essential part of the success of e-cigarettes, especially during initiation of e-cigarette use

AT VAPEGEEK: "We have a small collection of “Truly 100% VG” based e-liquids as well. Many times, there is a trace amount of PG in the flavorings themselves, and these contain absolutely no trace of PG.

• Blueberry – Sweet blueberry flavor 
• Menthol – Pure Menthol flavor 
• RootBeer – Awesome. Not too heavily flavored so it becomes perfumey like many others, but sweet and really really good. 
• UltraSmooth – This is our regular Ultra Light flavor except made 100% VG. 
• Vanilla – Basic vanilla 

These are our Dekang Flavors:

• 555 DK – A european cigarette flavor fthat has been very popular here in the states. 
• Desert DK – Popular American cigarette brand – think of the animal in the desert. 
• Flue Cured DK – Classic cigarette flavor appeals to the Virginia Slims and BandH crowd. 
• French Pipe DK – Another pipe flavored blend. 
• Menthol (DK) – Dekangs classic menthol flavor – always a best seller and the most popular menthol flavor. Mint (DK) – A peppermint flavor. Mocha Coffee (DK) – Much loved Dekang flavor – so loved I have problems keeping it in stock. Mild coffee, medium mocha. Wonderful flavor – easy all day vape. 
• Pall Mall DK – Classic cigarette flavor RY4 DK – Tobacco with heavy undertones of vanilla and caramel. This is a great transition flavor from tobaccos to the rest of the wonderful world of e-liquid flavors. 
• Triple Menthol (DK) – This is a “super menthol” flavor that is new but much loved already. 
• Twinmint (DK) – Like the gum in the green wrapper. You know, with the twins. 
• USA Mix DK – Americas favorite cigarette flavor. 
• USA Red DK – Americas favorite flavor, red. Vanilla (DK) – A much milder flavored vanilla – loads of people use this as a mixer with tobaccos and anything else that needs a little smoothing out. - 

See more at: http://www.vapegeek.com/vapeblog/#sthash.OA9ykael.dpuf

____________________Reference
http://ecigarette-research.com/web/index.php/2013-04-07-09-50-07/140-eu-war
http://ecigarette-research.com/web/index.php/2013-04-07-09-50-07/141-south-korean
http://ecigarette-research.com/web/index.php/2013-04-07-09-50-07/140-eu-war
http://ecigarette-research.com/web/index.php/2013-04-07-09-50-07/139-the-european-union-ignores
http://ecigarette-research.com/web/index.php/2013-04-07-09-50-07/138-cinnamon-flavours-in-e-cigarettes
http://ecigarette-research.com/web/index.php/2013-04-07-09-50-07/137-nicotine-content-in-e-cigarette
http://www.clivebates.com/?p=1655
http://www.ecigarettedirect.co.uk/ashtray-blog/2013/11/ways-electronic-cigarette-better-than-sex.html
http://nicotinepolicy.net/documents/policy/Article%2018%20-%20Electronic%20cigarettes%20-%20Commission%20proposal%2022%20Nov%202013.pdf
http://www.argusleader.com/poll/2013-11-25/7591384
http://www.ecigarettedirect.co.uk/ashtray-blog/2013/11/new-eu-ecig-ban-how-to-defeat-it.html

MooPig Church of the Beach :: "Meet the Church Hoppers"

Church Health
Retrieved by Pat Darnell  |  Nov 25, 2013  |  Bryan TX

MooPig Wisdom doesn't like to toot its own horn ... well, on second thought, we do toot our own horn ... a lot ... but we see NATGEO TV has used our idea for yet another reality show. We would have called it Church Report Card ... but they have enlisted three hunky men to gather information about a struggling church out there. Then they propose a fixer up plan, and go through the process of what amounts to storefront architectural re-hab. They call it CHURCH RESCUE TEAM, featuring the Church Hoppers.

MooPig Church of the Beach Department thinks it is pretty cool now that NATGEO has filmed its first few episodes. Our guys went out and printed some T-shirts and caps with "Church Report Card" on them. Then they issued this statement:

"As you might have known, we advertise MooPig is enemy of bombast. However, it is revolutionary that we at MooPig A-and-E with unanimous aplomb decide that bombast does in fact have a place in our simulations of Church of the Beach formats. We have come to realize that bombast in its rawest form serves skeletal ambitions like War and Faith. So, bombast is our friend in this newest buona-venture, as ludicrous as that is."

Maybe someday our editorial groups will sync with modern media in a MooPig Reality Show; like a barbecue or something.

Meet the Church Hoppers | National Geographic Channel: "Unfortunately, running a successful parish isn't as easy as just gathering your neighbors in praise. Forty percent of new churches fail within the first year and eighty percent go under in five years. "

EXCERPT
" ... So what happens when a church is failing to thrive? Enter the Church Hoppers. The team is comprised of Kevin “Rev Kev” Annas, Anthony “Gladamere “ Lockhart, and Jerry “Doc” Bentley. Rev Kevin is the resident business guru, who applies his entrepreneurial experience to churches' finances and operations to make sure they're running smoothly. Gladamere is the crew's sales and marketing specialist, helping refine churches' brands and promote their message to the community. Doc is a counselor, motivational speaker and the Hoppers' Church Systems Analyst, getting to know each individual parish's faith to help the church meet its goals. ..."

'via Blog this'

COMMENTS from Site:

Chris Gragg 6 days ago

"Rev Kev"...hahahaha! They had to add an extra sewage treatment plant in Caldwell county for all the people he crapped out of money. I hope he's had a change of heart, but his history sure doesn't leave him with a good testimony in running a "church business". I believe he may have a better career as a politician considering he has never run a business effectively. Personally, I wouldn't let him get his hands on my monopoly game money. NatGeo you guys need to do some background checks before buying a reality show.


______________________Reference
http://channel.nationalgeographic.com/channel/church-rescue/articles/meet-the-church-hoppers/
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2010/04/moopigs-church-of-beach-easter-eve-2010.html

MooPig Church of the Beach Department :: "Church Report Card"

[Pictures LINK]


MooPig Wisdom: MooPig's Church of the Beach :: Easter Eve 2010: "We are always committed when we start a new thing; and always uncover some revelations from our hospital beds. As often the case, our upstart, in-house discussions so far have invariably ended in fine strands of sifting Sand; like sand in an hour glass.

As many grains of sand there are on the beach, there are as many denominations. We will stick to main stream churches for method of liturgy for worship of Christ by congregating humans. We noticed right away that our History of Churches is actually History of Churches Splitting, and less about good will.

As you might have known, we advertise MooPig is enemy of bombast. However, it is revolutionary that we at MooPig A-and-E with unanimous aplomb decide that bombast does in fact have a place in our simulations of Church of the Beach formats. We have come to realize that bombast in its rawest form serves skeletal ambitions like War and Faith. So, bombast is our friend in this newest buonaventure, as ludicrous as that is. (Pat Darnell. April 03, 2010. LINK ) ... "

That was PART ONE ...

'via Blog this'

Christian Church Report Card
Retrieved by Pat Darnell  |  Nov 21, 2013  |  Bryan TX

This is PART TWO ...

In an honest evaluation, will some churches rise above other churches? We at MooPig Church of the Beach Department don't know the answer. What does stand out is church growth versus church decline. Numbers today, and the ability to count those numbers, indicate that some churches have reached their peak in membership, while others are still waxing or waning in church-o-sphere.

MooPig's ideal church would be found on a grassy plain that is bordered on one side with bluffs and hills, and on the other side by the ocean. Ideally there would stand a stone precipice, that is both weather proof rugged, while pleasantly pedestrian, surrounded by a garden, near the beach.

Then we would hope that the worship and praise time in this idyllic church would result in edification with visions in mind, heart and soul.  Critics would be welcomed, the minister would speak of the true Word of Christ in a concert of prayer. Money would not be the root of stewardship. And a lot more fantasizing about our ideal church results in an "impossible church."

Most all other institutions have empirical data collected to describe their existence. Why don't churches have report cards? But if MooPig is to start such a standard for church comparisons, what we first need is what we found at this one site:

Church Growth Research Graphs and Statistics: "We compared over 1,103 churches for 15 years to what constitutes a healthy church from our other research. The churches surveyed and tracked include reports from 23 denominations. Said earlier research pointed to 44 significant growth factors. We then complied and compared growth and failure rates: 44 Church Growth Principles that are Real and Work!"

'via Blog this'

MooPig Church of the Beach Department asks the question "Are churches growing or declining?" First we need a standard so we can measure church performance. Here nicely are 44 Principles that work nicely for us. These principles apply to Biblical Churches, which means the goings on of the church is based on Bible scriptures.

We unabashedly present this 44 Principles from the cited source:

Forty-four Proven and Effective Biblical Church Growth Principles that Work! Ideas to consider: (Romans 12:18; 14:18-19; Ephesians 4:3; Hebrews 12:14)

 1. The number one reason for church growth is the preaching ability of the pastor. (Luke 3:1-7)

 2. The number one reason why people stop coming to your church is conflict and gossip! (James 3:5-6)

 3. The number two reason that people leave a church is poor "people skills" of the pastor and/or leadership, because they do not manage the conflicts and gossip! These poor "people skills" will cause the majority of conflicts between that pastor and the people. (Matthew 5:9)

 4. The Bible must be taught in such a way that it is real and can be applied to the lives and situations of the people. You are to equip and disciple people, not just in the basics of the faith, but also in how to be Christians in their families, work, and relationships. They must be taught how to be effective Christians ... (Psalm 119:9-12)

5. Preach holiness, how to worship, how to deal with sin, how to relate to one another, and how to love one another, while modeling it yourself! Evangelism, stewardship, and discipleship come out of these! As people are transformed, they can be taught and motivated. (Jeremiah 33:6; Romans 7:12; Galatians 3)

6 . The best growing churches in the world have solid Biblical preaching at their core. These churches do not water down the Gospel so much that you cannot see the lifted cross! They do not overemphasize the seeker and ignore discipleship!

 7. Real, heartfelt, God exalting adoration must be the focus of the worship service. It must never lift up the leaders or be a performance to entertain. It is God who is the audience and we are the people who are to praise and glorify Him! ... Remember, the congregation is the performer, the worship team is the leader, and God is the audience! Don't mix these up! This is where all of the church growth and spiritual growth principles come to their focal point--the reason for discipleship, and maturity.... (Psalm 138:1-4)

 8. You must have a well thought out, empowered vision and mission statement with a clearly defined purpose, and strategies on what God has called you to do and be. It must be real and authentic, and you must be willing to act on it. It is one thing to write it out, but another thing to act it out ... (Hebrews 11:1-2)

 9. Teach and model passionate spirituality. The Christian life is not meant to be dry and mundane. Even the Puritans were vibrant, just read their writings! Your job is to convince the people in your church to grow beyond just doing their duty to achieving spiritual passion and conviction. (Phil. 3:7-11)

 10. The training, discipling, recognition, and encouragement of the church are critical roles for the pastor. If the senior pastor feels he does not have the gifts and abilities to equip and train others to do ministry, then he needs to build a team around him that does! If the training is not done, the church will fail! ... (Romans 7:4-6; 1 Corinthians 10:14-16; 12; Ephesians 4:9-16)

 11. Have a system of pastoral care to train your staff and leaders to immediately respond when they hear of a church member, especially another leader ... or someone in their family with a pastoral need or emergency. Assign a key person to be in change by 24-hour shifts. Have a contact list and trained deacons or care workers to be ready to act when the need arises.... We all need support and care! Make sure you have caring people to be there in a timely manner! (1 Corinthians 13:1-8; Colossians 4:5; 1 Timothy 3:14-15; Hebrews 12:14-15)

 12. Confront sin, evil, and heresy in the church immediately! The leadership must put down conflict quickly, whether it involves political agendas, the color of the carpet, how to say an offertory prayer, what songs to sing, or who is to be in leadership. The church must move in purpose and unity. This is tough, but possible! (Philippians 2:14)

 13. The church must be willing to spend at least one-third of its resources of time, talent, and money in outreach and missions. (Psalm 90:1-2)

 14. Political agendas that are contrary to God's Word and Will are the second biggest disruption to the church! (John 13:35)

 15. The church should strive to be effective. The best way to do this is by following the precepts of Scripture. We can organize the church by mobilizing the people according to their Spiritual Gifts! So few churches do this, even though it is so Scripturally clear! (Romans 12)

 16. The church can achieve the extraordinary when the people serve in their area of their giftedness in a team manner. The quarrels and apathy will dry up as the energies are redirected and channeled in a Godly way. ... (1 Corinthians 12-14)

 17. Good Biblical teaching and preaching will provide the Holy Spirit with fuel that energizes people and facilitates growth. The biggest growing churches are the ones who preach the Word with power, conviction, and in truth, such as Calvary Chapel (Acts 2:17-39)!

 18. The leadership must have a real genuine sense and modeling of being Christ's servant, and the people in their care as His children. This is Servant Leadership Development. (Galatians 2:20-21; Ephesians 4:11-13)

 19. Leaders of growing churches empower the people in their care. They do not see or use volunteers just as helpers, but as the tools and the prime resources with which to glorify God, and enablers of the goals of missions and needs to be reached. They do this by encouragement, training, and organization, all centered to have the people of God growing in and receiving the Spirit in order to reach the full potential that God has for them. If a pastor, coach, or key supervisor gives special recognition and encouragement even once, that leader and/or volunteer will usually remain very faithful and loyal to the church! (Romans 12; John 4:23; Colossians 1:24-29; 1 Timothy 4:15-16)

 20. The leadership must be able to steer the church through rough white waters! (See our articles on Conflict Resolution, Gossip, and Hypocrisy, and Matthew 18)

21 . The best plans and calls of the Lord will stall out due to conflict! God's voice is the first one muted--read the book of Amos! The Holy Spirit cannot work effectively when ill will and ill desires are running the roost. You must drop to your collective knees and pray for revival. That will work! However, church growth, spiritual or numerical, will never work in an atmosphere of conflict! (Philippians 1:6-8)

 22. The best way to deal with conflict is to combat it through love. When people know that you love them and will listen to them, it is difficult for them to be mad. Love, indeed, covers a multitude of sins! (Proverbs 10:12 1 Peter 4:8)

 23. Warning: do not agree when you do not! (Proverbs 9:8; 17:27-28; 26:20; 3 John 9-12)

 24. Be careful about taking on too many negative people! Spread the load out. Delegate. There is only so much you can take, so guard your own heart too! (Proverbs 4:23)

 25. If you want people to like you, then be nice to them! Interesting people are interesting because they are interested in others! People like people who like them, so be kind, thoughtful, listen, be polite, and do not forget to smile. Make sure you are real, for if you are not, then you are in the wrong position or profession! You must enjoy people and be interested in them to be a good leader or pastor. Being prideful and/or obnoxious only serves Satan! (James 1:2; Colossians 3:13)

 26. Sometimes people just will not like you if you are modeling Christ, and some do not like to be led to Scriptural principles. These people are happy in their will and desires, and will not like the Fruits of the Spirit working around them. They are the weeds in the wheat. Let those people go, and focus on the ones whose hearts are after His! (Romans 16:17-18; Galatians 1:10; Titus 3:9-11)

 27. Listening, without arguing or defending yourself, is extremely important! This requires prayer and self-discipline. If you cannot do it, you may be in the wrong profession. Have someone do it, just get it done! Your task is not to persuade people to accept your view, but to communicate Biblical precepts and get them to catch it! You are to make them feel heard. When they feel they are listened to, then their defenses will come down and relationships can be built. Then it will be a pleasure to lead them. They will respect and love you more, and will be more likely to be led by your goals. (Romans 8:31; Ephesians 4:25-29; James 3:1-12)

 28. If, and when you use surveys, make sure you are determining between perceived felt needs versus real needs and what God is calling you to! Otherwise, you will take your church down a rabbit trail away from God's call! (Ephesians 5:8-21)

 29. A leader must be willing to make improvements and change, even if it steps on the toes of others, but stay firm and be uncompromising to the Word. At the same time, allow people to be in the process with a listening ear, so they can catch the new direction and take ownership of it. (Colossians 4:7-8; Philippians 4:8-9)

 30. Are you and your leadership learning and growing in community with one another, willing to go beyond your prejudices and fears and embrace what Christ has for you? (Colossians 1:24-29; 1 Timothy 3:14-15)

 31. A church's spiritual health is a matter of focus. To develop an action plan, to change the pew-sitting church into the Christ powered church, you have to go beyond talking about it and actually do something! This requires a focus on Christ that turns into passion and conviction. That passion must come from growth in Christ. If it does not, you will be working for yourselves and not for the Lord and Creator of the Universe! The focus must be on Christ, not the church. That focus determines whether you have a survival mentality or a service mentality. Do you have a church filled with competing agendas, or one with a purpose that is poured out to our Lord? (Philippians 3:10)

 32. A church must disciple, and small groups are the best means to do this. Arrange, train, and lead your small group leaders to teach the Bible clearly, going beyond just discussing passages to applying it to their daily lives. Make sure these groups focus on prayer, allowing healthy interaction, so people feel free to express issues, ask questions, and discuss the concerns of life, as the leadership encourages as well as teaches. (Psalm 119:9-12; Ecclesiastes 4:8-10; Matthew 6:33-34; 28:18-20)

 33. Teach and model Discipleship, so that personal disciplines are in the Word, and you are filled with excitement and wonder, willing to train, share, and/or teach others what you have learned. (Matthew 28:18-20)

 34. If the primary emphasis is on maintaining your building, or on getting more people involved, or on money, this is sure evidence that the focus is on survival. Do the people have a willingness to serve? If so, this is the greatest gauge of a Christ centered church! That willingness to model Christ in the community will only come out when it is done to others in the church first! That focus can only come out with a servant-focused attitude! (Matthew 28:18-20)

 35. Pastors, who are real, and authentic, lead healthy churches. This builds trust. Real, authentic leaders will never grandstand, make up problems, or blame others, but will take responsibility, and tell their stories honestly. In wisdom, they will disclose truth, tempered with listening. Be open, and encourage the other leaders to do so too. Authentic leaders can be vulnerable and sensitive at the right times in the right places, and yet wise enough not to give out too much so as to be perceived as week and needy. Real Christians will forgive you for your mistakes when you are honest! (Acts; James 5:16; 1 John 1:8-10)

 36. All too often in the American church, we try to offer people community without cause. The Seeker sensitive, watered down gospel says nothing and inspires people to do nothing. Without a real cause, the church is just another civic club, such as the Kiwanis or Lions. We have to teach the transformation that only Christ gives. (Ephesians 4:11-13)

 37. Find out what the image of your church is in the community. To do this, go door to door, and ask people how you can pray for them, then come together as a church to pray for them. While you are asking them for prayer requests, ask if they know about your church and what you can do to improve. By doing this, you will get a feel about how the community sees you and then you can know what areas need improvement and work. This is a great project for all ages, especially youth groups! This prayer task can also be turned into a very effective way to reach out to people and transition into a "Lighthouse of Prayer." (Matthew 10)

 38. Communicating the gospel in a postmodern context can make us feel forced to compete with the entertainment industry. Do not let this happen. Most people are over stimulated already, and do not always need the PowerPoint and multimedia show. They need reality. Use media as a tool if you need to, or if your people like it, but ask and find out! (I personally love PowerPoint, but I was on staff at a church that did not, so I did not use it.) We cannot compete with Hollywood. Furthermore, we do not have to! We have the power and presence of the living God! (Isaiah 55:6-11; Jeremiah 31:31-34; Romans 6:3-11)

 39. Commitment to loving and caring relationships is essential! Loving relationships that are sincere, real, and practical from the work of Christ in your church will be the quintessential factor that will bring people in far better than any evangelism campaign could ever do! People do not want to just hear about Christ as much as they want to see and experience how Christian love really works. They can do this through you! Remember that Christ lived and taught the principle that people respond when we reach out to them. (Mark 12:28-31; John 3:22; 13:35; 1 Corinthians 13)

 40. Organize a prayer base in your church. See our Prayer Channel for details. See the article in our prayer channel, Leading the Church to be People of Prayer. (John 13:34-35; 20:19-23; Romans 12:1-21)

 41. For successful evangelism, the key is to focus the church's evangelistic efforts on the questions and needs of non-Christians. Find the need that is not being fulfilled and fulfill it, such as a parent support group, a daycare or an after school program. (2 Corinthian 2:3-4; Colossians 1:24-29; 1 Peter 3:15)

 42. Do not be afraid to preach Biblical stewardship and how to handle money. If you do not know how, acquire resources to help you. Stewardship, as well as generosity, is a sure sign of the health of your church. A stifled church, no matter how many are attending, will always have financial problems, where a small, poor church with real conviction and purpose will usually have enough! (Proverbs 3:9-10)

 43. Make sure your programming is appropriate and needed. (Philippians 3:12-14)

 44. A healthy church is prayerful in all of the aspects of church life and ministry. They are reliant upon God's power and the authority of His Word! (John 15:4-5)

 Copyright 1988, 1998, 2000 Richard J. Krejcir Into Thy Word Ministries www.intothyword.com

NEXT MONTH: PART THREE ... This is Grueling!


___________________________Reference
http://www.intothyword.org/apps/articles/?articleid=36571
http://70030.netministry.com/apps/articles/?articleid=32791&columnid=3881
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2013/03/moopig-earnings-tracking-department.html
http://blog.webchurchconnect.com/2013/02/13/2013-christianity-growth-us/
http://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Christian_denominations_by_number_of_members
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2010/04/moopigs-church-of-beach-easter-eve-2010.html
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2013/01/moopig-snappy-come-backs-department-100.html
http://moopigwisdom.blogspot.com/2011/06/moopig-pre-rapture-preparation.html

MooPig Report from the Middle :: "Dueling Dualies"

[Picture LINK]

When is it Politically Correct to ask: What Evil is This?
by Pat Darnell  |  Nov 24, 2013  |  Bryan TX

“The problem ain’t what we don’t know: it’s what we do know that ain’t so.” Yogi Berra

Evil doesn't like to be named. Ever notice that? It would rather remain incognito. But trends show up in modern reporting methods. Any one who steps into the stream of Internet-Tube-Radio today is pretty much snagged by millions in one's inception.

Evil then has to find different avenues to lurk about and to go unnoticed in its efficacy to spread its stories. Eh?

It is not likely that evil will even be abolished by the new transparency of our communications in our Internet Era. In fact evil doers will find a way to remain "Mysterious," regardless. Who will pay their way? As usual it will be middle people who fall for evil-doers' tricks; paying with their minds, souls, and bankrolls.

America’s angriest white men: Up close with racism, rage and Southern supremacy - Salon.com: EXCERPT  |   " ... the contemporary militias and other white supremacist groups are following in the footsteps of the Ku Klux Klan, the Posse Comitatus, and other Far Right patriot groups who recruited members in rural America throughout the 1980s. They tap into a long history of racial and ethnic paranoia in rural America, as well as an equally long tradition of collective local action and vigilante justice. There remains a widespread notion that “Jews, African-Americans, and other minority-group members ‘do not entirely belong,’” which may, in part, “be responsible for rural people’s easy acceptance of the far right’s agenda of hate,” writes Matthew Snipp. “The far right didn’t create bigotry in the Midwest; it didn’t need to,” Davidson concludes. “It merely had to tap into the existing undercurrent of prejudice once this had been inflamed by widespread economic failure and social discontent.”"

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'via Blog this'

Evil is no joke, but will have a big problem if laughed at, because of the size of its false ego ...that we will define as Eckhart Tolle says: "the complete identification with our thoughts and desires, usually with a selfish perspective."

Then there is the biggest question we all have on our lips, when is it politically correct to cal Evil out? Not only in the USA, but world wide we have experienced widespread segregation. It's not just blacks and whites with integration problems, it is common to all tribes of humans all over the globe. Any human activity that includes hate, genocide, or repression is Evil, yes?

MooPig Enterprises has long known that in the herd if you don't integrate with diversity in your genetic lineages, your herd will die out. Your herd will become sterile and have a zero population growth. If you push too far with the incest you will produce odd fellows, like a cousin 'It' in your herd. For example:

" ... Elected officials from Bossier Parish have always had a laissez-faire attitude toward conflicts of interest, nepotism, and brother-in-law dealings. Often referred to as the free state of Bossier, the parish and city governments operate like a magic kingdom in a child’s fairytale, –where good wins out over evil, and everything always ends happily ever after.(Settle, John. May 25, 2012. LINK) ... "

Is everything okay in the Lala Land of middle America; where Dualies and SUV's roam, and never is heard a disgruntled word because they are shut up immediately? Because it doesn't end with first generation rich folks; " ... one of the biggest advantages rich parents pass on to their offspring — let’s say the second-biggest, after “money” — is the sense of entitlement necessary for an entirely unaccomplished rich person to coast through life without constantly feeling crippling guilt (ALEX PAREENE. AUG 21, 2013. LINK )..."

What ever happened to causes that came up with "Make Love; Not War," and "Give Peace a Chance," and “There’s this idea that the more you have, the less entitled and more grateful you feel— and the less you have, the more you feel you deserve. That’s not what we find,” says author Paul Piff, a psychologist at the University of California in Berkeley. Second generation fortunate sons and daughters have forgotten that Evil likes to be unnoticed? Rich people basically say this out loud, in public, constantly, these days: The rich, THEY think they deserve it and you don’t.

CONCLUSION
Now that we have you all riled up... we just wanted to say that "Evil has no conscience; evil doesn't feel guilt." Evil can be identified in its duality, that is, its two-faced nature. Also, as we see more evil, we recognize its likes: it cannot help from boasting about its intentions and victories. For Evil to continue in obscurity, it therefore must find new avenues to travel to survive in perpetuity.

This all sound a bit preachy? Well, that is because it is MooPig's Report from the Middle; where women are strong, men are good-looking, and children are above average.


_____________________Reference
http://www.salon.com/2013/11/17/americas_angriest_white_men_up_close_with_racism_rage_and_southern_supremacy/
http://forward-now.com/?p=3849
http://readersupportednews.org/opinion2/275-42/8131-rick-perry-best-little-whore-in-texas
http://www.spiritualadventurer.com/ForgetTheEgo.html

Activist Post: Seven Volcanoes In Six Different Countries All Start Erupting Within Hours Of Each Other

Activist Post: Seven Volcanoes In Six Different Countries All Start Erupting Within Hours Of Each Other: "Thursday, November 21, 2013 Seven Volcanoes In Six Different Countries All Start Erupting Within Hours Of Each Other Chris Carrington Activist Post A new island has appeared in the Pacific. A submarine eruption just off Nishino-Shima Island Japan has erupted for the first time in 40 years. The Japanese Navy noticed the explosions as boiling lava met sea water giving rise to plumes of steam and ash."

'via Blog this'




__________________Reference
http://www.activistpost.com/2013/11/seven-volcanoes-in-six-different.html

Stats about all US cities - real estate, relocation info, crime, house prices, cost of living, races, home value estimator, recent sales, income, photos, schools, maps, weather, neighborhoods, and more

Stats about all US cities - real estate, relocation info, crime, house prices, cost of living, races, home value estimator, recent sales, income, photos, schools, maps, weather, neighborhoods, and more: "Visited by over 20 million unique visitors in June 2013, featured in 121 books, on CNN, WABC in New York, Bay News 9 in Tampa Bay, and USA Today's Hot Sites We've collected and analyzed data from numerous sources to create as complete and interesting profiles of all U.S. cities as we could.  We have over 74,000 city photos not found anywhere else, graphs of latest real estate prices and sales trends, recent home sales, home value estimator, hundreds of thousands of maps, satellite photos, stats about residents (race, income, ancestries, education, employment...), geographical data, state profiles, crime data, registered sex offenders, cost of living, housing, religions, businesses, local news links based on our exclusive technology, birthplaces of famous people, political contributions,"

'via Blog this'




________________________Reference
http://www.city-data.com/

YIKES!!
Correlated by Pat Darnell  |  Apr 11, 2013  |  Bryan TX

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"You slide down in your seat and make yourself comfortable. On the screen in front of you, the movie image appears—enormous and overwhelming. If the movie is a good one, you allow yourself to be absorbed in its fantasy, and its dreams become part of your memories"

Roger Ebert wrote those words in 1980 for The Atlantic magazine, a love letter to the medium that became his employer: the movies. After a 46-year tenure as film critic for the Chicago Sun-Times, several decades hosting a hugely influential television show, a landmark Pulitzer Prize, and countless thumbs in both directions, Ebert died Thursday at age 70. ( Kevin Fallon Apr 4, 2013 LINK)

Roger Ebert, Movie Critic of the Mainstream, Dies at 70 - NYTimes.com:

We wake up one day and find that Roger Ebert, the Ted Copol of movie critiques, is passed away. Here is the website to find many Ebert reviews. Sadly, he won't be giving us his cinema wit or wisdom from this time on.

Unless someone gives Ebert life after death, we will miss his thumbs up ... OH WAIT WHAT IS THIS?

'via Blog this'

"Now the famed critic is in a new jurisdiction, where he can see the blessings poured out on God's humble servants in heaven, from his seat of eternal torment and sorrow in Hell! It's too late for the fool Roger Ebert! WBC will continue to bind those who still live in Doomed america to God's eternal laws and Word, so you, like Roger, are without excuse!"

That is what is being said by the Westboro Church Gang, as they talk ill about the dead. Nice going W-boro Dissidents, especially now that Roger Ebert can't offer you his rebuttal. He's dead.

These boneheads call him a "fag enabler." What the hell does that mean? Why does this issue, which isn't an issue, create such misanthropic and seething, egotistical, hatred of humanity?

Ebert might respond to Westboro Baptist wankers this way:

"You misguided cynical, carper, caviler, detractors, disbelievers, doubters, doubting Thomas's, egoist, egotistic, flouters, misanthropic, misogamist, misogynist, mockers, pessimistic, satirist, scoffers, skeptical, sneerers, unbelievers ... would make a wonderful movie project. Two thumbs up."

______________________________Reference
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/04/05/movies/roger-ebert-film-critic-dies.html?src=me&ref=general

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/westboro-baptist-church-picket-roger-434594
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2013/04/04/roger-ebert-s-10-best-reviews-and-10-best-zingers.html

To Anyone Wishing to Date My Daughter

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement,
job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________

HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________

SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES__________________________________________

HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain: _____________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________

Number of years they have been married ______________________________

If less than your age, explain
____________________________________________ ________________________

____________________________________________________________________


ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No

B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No

C. A waterbed? __Yes __No

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No

E. A tattoo? __Yes __No

F. Do you have an earring, nose ring, __Yes __No
pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring?

(IF YOU ANSWERED 'YES' TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION
AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)

ESSAY SECTION:
In 50 words or less, what does 'LATE' mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does 'DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER' mean to you?

__________________________________________________________ ____

______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does 'ABSTINENCE' mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

REFERENCES SECTION:

Church you attend ___________________________________________________

How often you attend ________________________________________________

When would be the best time to interview your:

father? _____________

mother? _____________

pastor? _____________

SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers
are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want to be shot would be:

______________________________________________________________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:

______________________________________________________________

C: A woman's place is in the:

______________________________________________________________

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:

______________________________________________________________

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________________________

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:

_________________________________ _____________________________

F. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? __________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO
THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT,
NATIVE AMERICAN ANTI TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE
WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.


_________________________________________________________
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)


_______________________________ ________________________________
Mother's Signature Father's Signature

_______________________________ ________________________________
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual.
Please allow four to six years for processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would cause you injury).
If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases. (you might watch your back)

To prepare yourself, start studying Daddy's Rules for Dating (below).

Parents' Rules for Dating
Your parents' rules for your boyfriend (or for you if you're a guy) :

Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them..

Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a 'Barrier method' of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is: 'early.'

Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge . Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual themes are to be avoided; movies which feature chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi . When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.
Sincerely - Mom & Dad